Everyone can use a little advice. This past year especially, I have learned a lot about life. These 10 points come from personal experiences, hardships, and successes – or what I will call "research." I hope this helps anyone and everyone who needs a little guidance, reassurance, or comfort in their lives.
1. Don't expect anything, good or bad.
I think we expect people to either disappoint us or valiantly surpass our presumptions of them. But the reality is, the future is unpredictable and so are people. Expect only things of yourself and you will never be disappointed.
2. Expect the unexpected.
Sometimes, you don't expect to meet certain people or end up in certain situations. Things don't go as planned, and sometimes there is no plan. Spontaneity is a beautiful thing, though.
3. Forgive yourself.
We can be our own greatest critics. Stop beating yourself up about the big things or little things you screw up. People make mistakes. After you've done all you can do to fix something, you need to stop dwelling on it.
4. Live in the moment.
We can either overanalyze the past or be so obsessed with what is going to happen next that we forget there is a precious "now" in front of us. Don't forget to enjoy the moment before it becomes a memory. Time flies by faster than you'd think.
5. Make your own rules.
Rules are meant to be broken. One of my favorite college lectures I attended this past year was about breaking society's "soft rules." Soft rules like "let the guy text you first," "only girls really wear pink," and "you can only eat breakfast food in the morning" are pointless and only add unnecessary anxiety to our day-to-day lives. If I want to text the guy I like who wears pink to get eggs and bacon at 10 p.m., I am doing it. After all, you only live once.
6. You can't control others, only yourself.
This is the only thing my dad ever really says when I come to him with problems in my friendships and relationships. As hard as this is for me to hear, it's true. Life gets a lot easier when you are armed with this piece of wisdom. Once you stop trying to control others, you can really concentrate on what YOU can do for yourself. When you work with the variables you actually control, you start to see the results and changes you want.
7. Patience pays off.
Good things come to those who wait.
8. Change is hard, but usually needed.
When change comes, it's either because you are in need of it and actively seeking it out, or because you are comfortable. When everything seems to be going right, change seems horrible. Yet, when the universe makes you uncomfortable, it means it is time for you to grow as a person. Own that s*&t.
9. Don't pretend to be someone you aren't.
Sometimes we are so insecure, we think that changing ourselves or hiding who we really are will make us more popular or more lovable or more successful. Newsflash: it won't. If pretending works out at first, it will end really badly down the road when the truth comes out. If you are yourself, you will attract people who love you for you, and you will thrive.
10. Everything happens for a reason.
Sometimes we don't understand why things happen. Since the begging of time, mankind has tried to explain the unexplainable. I believe that everything is connected; each thing that happens to you, each person you meet, place you visit, and moment you experience shapes who you are as a person and the future. Just know that even the worst of things can really be a blessing in disguise or at least a chance to learn about yourself.