No one is perfect all of the time. In reality, no one is perfect even half of the time. If we were perfect, there wouldn’t be evolution, or technology, or even medicine! The only reason why any great feat is accomplished is because of trial and error. So, why do we keep doing this to ourselves? If it is impossible to avoid the terror of failing, why do we try anyway?
No matter the reason, there are a handful of things that every perfectionist experiences regularly as well as ways that we treat these experiences.
1. When we fail, not only do we hate ourselves, but we expect that others do as well.
“If I judge myself so harshly, why wouldn’t my peers?”
2. It requires an enormous amount of time and hard work.
“I’ll wake up at 6 a.m. so I can study for Biology, and then I’ll still have time to study for Art before class! Who needs sleep?”
3. Even when we don’t work, we are thinking about work.
“Tomorrow, I really have to think about working on that assignment that is due in a couple of weeks. How is it only 1 a.m.? I thought I got in bed hours ago!”
4. Then when we don’t think about work, we think about who worked harder than us.
“Maybe if I didn’t watch that half episode of SpongeBob, I would have gotten one point higher than her on the quiz!”
5. We have too many hobbies and commitments.
“On Monday I have softball practice, Tuesday is piano lessons, Wednesday is volunteering…”
6. This, of course, leads to extra work.
“I must block out some extra time in my schedule to practice before and after my piano lesson in between homework”
7. We judge ourselves for relaxing...
“Why are you sitting on the couch watching TV when you should be trying to get an A on your homework?!
8. ...So much, that some commitments have turned into our way of relaxing.
“I’m getting a little bit tired of reading this chapter so I’ll just chill out with some flashcards!”
9. We think most people hate us for trying too hard.
“I got another A! Everyone is probably so jealous that they don’t want to talk to me.”
10. Everything you do has to be perfect.
The art of perfectionism can easily become a life of stress and hate, but it is also the biggest source of motivation I have ever had. Yes, it may lead to a large amount of insecurity and an unsettled nature, but it also allows me to accomplish all of my wildest dreams, no matter what they are.
