New season, new team. After being manhandled in the championship last year by extremely well dressed Betas, ZBT is looking to bounce back strong this season and capture their third fraternity league title in four years. Captain Ben Mitchel held tree-outs for the team on Jan. 9 and finally decided to run with 10 players, this season. All 10 players and the head coach will contribute in one way or another, and here is why.
Evan Horowitz, h
ead coachYear: Senior.
Height: 5'8.
Weight: 150.
Nicknames: Evnasty, E-hor.
Horowitz is the figurehead of the team. Although he doesn't know anything about the game of basketball, every great organization needs a nice looking head coach dressed in a suit yelling, "box out!" from the sidelines while out-fratting the other team's underdressed head coach. Mainly for morale purposes, Evan will definitely bring his wisdom to the team and make Ben Mitchel peanut butter and jealous.
Ryan Binkley, guard
Year: Sophomore.
Height: 5'11.
Weight: 160.
Nicknames: Binknasty, SteinBinkle, Binkelstein, Guy, Taylor Muth, Jimmy John, Guy Guy.
After watching him play, I am pretty sure you can rearrange the letters in his name to spell Paul Pierce. An elite bucket getter coming off the bench, his Pierce-esque lackadaisical, yet efficient, play can be attributed to Binkley's life motto of, "But I'm in a frat." Don't be fooled by his blonde hair and his shaggy beard.
Andrew Soll, c
enter.Year: Sophomore.
Height: 6'5.
Weight: 200.
Nicknames: See below.
Better known as The Jewish Shaq, a.k.a. Loid, a.k.a. Trunk, a.k.a. W, a.k.a The Half Triple Double, Soll is ready to take a major role on the team, this year. His consistent post-play combined with his stellar rim protecting skills and his tendency to come to the games blacked out (just kidding) makes him a force to be reckoned with in the Orange Fraternity Basketball League.
Max Udine, guard
Year: Freshman.
Height: 5'10.
Weight: 143.
Nicknames: Maxi-Pad, Bubba Bubba Max, UdineOENO Udine's career stats while playing pick up at SouthWest Rec are as follows: 433/441 from three, 2/5 from inside the arc, 7 rebounds, 18 assists, one scraped knee, and 14 tears. If you pass him the ball behind the three-point line, bucket. Kid shoots the ball better than Ray Allen. On top of his automatic stroke, he plays with a chip on his shoulder due to living his entire basketball career in the shadow of his twin brother, who currently plays ball for NYU. Don't sleep on him. He is the X factor.
Jake Edelstein, guard
Year: Junior.
Height: 5'9.
Weight: 150.
Nicknames: Jake, Edelstein, Ben Mitchel's Best Friend, Arnold.
Edelstein is a seasoned veteran of warming the bench. He played high school ball at American Heritage, an elite basketball program that spit out players like Kenny Boynton, Kobe Eubanks, Keyshawn Evans, and Drake Lamont. Being an undersized guard, he became an elite defender. Not the type of defender who will lock you up, but the type of defender who will lock you and make you feel a baby back you know what. He's the type of defender who might mess around and end your entire career.
Cory Baach, power forward
Year: Sophomore.
Height: 6'3.
Weight: 215.
Nicknames: I'll-Be-Baach, PCP, CB Hoops (We Out), Playoff Choker, Taylor Muth, Bory Caach.
Baach is, by far, the densest player in the entire league. After playing a whopping total of 4 minutes last season Baach is determined to get on the floor to prove his worth to the fraternity. Cory loves to be a floor general, which often conflicts with how the team wants to use him on offense, but he and player-coach coach Ben Mitchel have met many times this offseason to get on the same page. "We're gonna try to keep the ball out of Cory's hands as much as possible. We're at our best when Cory doesn't touch the ball," says Ben Mitchel.
Oliver Hart III, guard
Year: Senior.
Height: 6'
Weight: 195.5.
Nicknames: The Dark Knight, Prez, Oh, 2nd Team All NAACP.
Hart is certainly the most talented player returning to the ZBT squad this season. Last year, he averaged 14 points and five assists a game, and was a consistent scorer in the clutch. This season, Hart is eager to throw down his first slam dunk of his fraternity basketball career (currently 0 for 7 lifetime in games). This is his first team, and he will either die a hero, or live long enough to see himself become the villain.
Tyler DrescherPosition: Center
Year: Sophomore
Height: 6'4
Weight: 172
Nicknames: Malfoy, T-Dresch, Pogo-Stick, Stringbean, Dat Dude, TD
Drescher, the newly elected president of UF's ZBT chapter, is very eager for his first shot at the fraternity league. With the instincts of Dennis Rodman, combined with the brain of Dennis Rodman, Drescher is undoubtedly the biggest wildcard on the team. When asked about his thoughts on the upcoming season Drescher stated, "These boys better be ready, 'cuz I'm finna yam on dudes. Shout out NBP. I wish I went to Cypress tho. One's up."
Richard MinichielloPosition: Forward
Year: Sophomore
Height: 6'4
Weight: 169
Nicknames: MiniRich, Dick, Rich, Yoshi
Minichiello has ups like no other. When he is not picnicking with his girlfriend, you can find Rich teaching jumping classes at Southwest Rec. Rich specializes on the defensive side of the ball, where he managed to rack up 2.2 blocks per game while averaging just 7 minutes a game. As long as Rich actually shows up to games, he will contribute this season.
Coby PowersPosition: Center
Year: ?
Height: 6'4
Weight: 195
Nicknames: Wonderbread, Psycho C
Powers is a clear and very seasoned veteran of the ZBT basketball program. We predict that Coby is about a 7th(?) year student and we are unsure of how he is still even eligible to play. Anyways, his fierce attitude and extremely nice hair will scare opponents away instantly. If anyone out on the court be "ackin a foo", he's the guy you send out to throw hands with the opponents. With a frame and nickname like his, he will be the teams enforcer.
Ben MitchelPosition: Guard
Year: Junior
Height: 5'9
Weight: 160
You have heard this name many times throughout this article. Mitchel is the reason this team is as good as it is. As the teams self-appointed captain, CEO, CFO, Owner, President, GM, and Player-Coach, it's Ben's job to motivate the team, energize the team, and cry when the team loses. Moving to PG1 this year, without Ben playing to his upmost jewish athlete potential, the team will not succeed.
This upcoming SZN is a very important one for this team. Will they succeed? Will they fail? Will Cory Baach's fraternity think he's cool now?
All of these questions will be answered starting January 25th.
Be there.
