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You're Trying Too Hard

An objective look at the everyday hipster.

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You're Trying Too Hard
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Oh Millennials.

You see them everywhere. Sporting a distressed denim jacket, Doc Martens, and a beanie from the nearest thrift shop (the shadier the better). With this recent influx of “hipsters”, you have to ask, how does one become “hip” or even more introspective, what indicates a try hard? The answer lies in the obvious, music, food, and clothing.

You won’t catch a good hipster listening to anything in the top 50. Or even the top 100. Top 200 is pushing it, but it’s guaranteed that they discovered the band before they were signed to label. Hipster music consists of eclectic banjos, the occasional uke, trumpets, and if they’re really out there, weird techo equipment that has a bunch of numbers in its name. Tread lightly when you talk about your favorite band, they will surely have an opinion. If it’s bad, you will be reduced to the size of Nickleback’s fan base post 2010. And any good hipster has an extensive record collection, a closet full of ambiguous band merch, and Spotifty playlists just for indie girl duos. Honestly, music is the great divider between a true hipster and a try hard.

Next, and just as telling, is the food choices of a self proclaimed hipster. Some are vegetarian, others vegan, but all love coffee. Starbucks? No. Hole in the wall café by the dumpsters in the back alley? Yes. They like their coffee hot and arguable, like their last mixtape they dropped on SoundCloud. Of equal importance, tea. Chamomile, Earl Grey, and English Breakfast, all staples in the hipster’s tea chest. Upon investigation, the hipster’s Instagram is usually littered with “foodie photos”. These pics employ pretty filters, clean, minimalistic lines, and of course, an all organic flatbread accompanied by farm fresh orange juice and some macaroons. All in all, hipsters are Wholefoods in a world of Walmarts.

And lastly, clothes. Flannels are a staple, skinny jeans are a must, and anything that alludes to the late 90’s is obvious. A hipster’s favorite stores are American Apparel, Urban Outfitters, and Goodwill. Spending $50 on a thin, cotton tee is no problem when you’re trying to achieve the “I don’t care, but I actually really care” look. At least 25% of a hipster’s wardrobe has holes in it, mostly manufactured. Ray Bans are another go to, especially with non prescription lenses and the more buttons on your Herschel backpack the better. Like sprinkles on a gluten free cupcake, the clothing makes the hipster.

All in all, labels are subjective. They vary from person to person. But the try hard hipster is blatantly obvious. In the end, you do you boo. Wear your button-up, rock your converse, and blast that early Artic Monkeys, cause no one is as cool and groovy and you.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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