I work with kids, four of them to be exact. Four little boys spaced out perfectly in age; ages two, four, six and eight. Perfect little angels, for me…most of the time. They play instruments, know their numbers and love to play video games. Every day we read a chapter from a chapter book and watch a nice movie, we do workbook pages and dance around to Disney music. We have a pretty good time together.
The other day, two of the kids and I were watching a movie, “Guardians of the Galaxy.” In the beginning scene of the movie, the young boy is sitting with his ill mother in the hospital. About three minutes into the movie, she dies. I couldn’t hold myself together, I began to cry and whimper and look for a tissue to blow my nose. The three-year-old looks at me to make sure I’m okay and then asks “why are you crying?” What is the answer to that? Can you explain to a three-year-old that the reason you cry when something sad happens in a movie is because you fear it will become true of real life? My own mother is ill, so to see a mother pass away is hard, it scares me into a belief that this will be my life and that I cannot prevent it. I looked at the child and explained: “it’s sad when mommies die and it just makes me think about what would happen if my mommy died.” The three-year-old looked at me and said “oh I don’t think like that.” I was startled by the response, you’re three, do you even really have a thought on this topic?
“What do you think about then during sad times of movies?” Children say the most interesting things. Following a child’s story is almost like walking through a house of mirrors with only one eye open. The story goes all over the place and you’re constantly questioning if you’ve even retained any piece of information that was given. Three-year-olds have a way of seeing an object surrounding them and then working said object into their story somehow; it’s quite intriguing to see their imagination. But while kids are blank slates and so impressionable, they are also great teachers. Children teach forgiveness. I met my friend’s niece and the little girl was probably about eleven. The girl’s father had taken off when she was a baby so she never really met him but that didn’t seem to bother her as much as it did her mother. Her mother had recently heard that the father had a new wife and new kids and actually began a family. Let me be the first to say this; I learned my way of forgiveness from an eleven-year-old girl. Her mother sat very upset because she and her daughter were abandoned by this man, but her daughter just looked at her and said “don’t be upset, be happy for him. He finally learned how to be a dad.” Sure that’s terrific and all, but it doesn’t change the fact that he left them. And while yes that fact doesn’t change, one can still learn to forgive and move on. And who would have thought that lesson would come from someone so young.
As the summer ends, I’m going to miss these kids that I’ve spent every day with for the past eight weeks. They became my life. Somehow, they became my kids. But I will be returning to my daycare at school and I am just as eager to see them and spend my days with them as I was to wake up every morning to nanny these boys at home. Children are so impressionable and I truly believe it is one of the biggest problems this country faces that we cannot provide enough or too much for our children. They have such imaginations and they have such a way about life, it’s almost impossible to not love them. So love them. Appreciate your time with young children and love them. And teach them. And while you’re teaching them and loving them, don’t forget to open your mind because maybe, just maybe, they’ll teach you something too.
