You're saying our names wrong. Oftentimes, we won't correct you. We will listen, try not to cringe and answer when you call us. We'll make a point of saying them correctly in front of you, probably with extra emphasis, hoping you catch on.
Addressing and correcting someone who mispronounces your name incorrectly can be daunting. If that person is older than you, it can seem even rude. It's time that this fear is overcome.
I admit, I have struggled with this in my past and still have problems with it today. It's often easier to comply with a person's butchered pronunciation of your name than to go through the trouble of correcting them, especially if they have the wrong pronunciation reinforced and stuck in their head. The process is embarrassing for both parties. It is, however, a process that you should go through.
One of the easiest ways the diversity around us is represented is through our language and words. Your name may just be a string of letters and sounds, but it is your name and you should have some semblance of power over it. Often times, unique names in American society have cultural or ethnic significance. They originate from different languages and nations. Names have backgrounds just as diverse as the people that they describe. They are the first things that we learn to write and one of the first things we learn to say.
If you have a commonly mispronounced name, here are some tips to help prevent further butchering:
Make it as clear as possible.
If you are telling someone your name for the first time, say it slowly and phonetically correctly. Don't simplify it from the start.
React & respond.
If this person repeats your name, respond to their pronunciation. If it is said correctly, confirm this by responding with a simple "yes" or "correct." If the pronunciation is wrong, repeat your name. Try sounding out the syllables.
Accept compromise, not defeat.
If you see the other person struggling (some sounds are just harder for certain individuals to make than others) suggest a nickname or a last name that you don't mind being called instead.
Wrap it up quickly.
Don't let this situation drag out by refusing to correct people. Without correction, you assure people that everything is okay.
If you're on the other side of this spectrum and must address someone with a unique name, do not be afraid to confront them. Ask if you are saying their name right and ask if you are spelling it right. Never settle for an almost correct version of you or your name because names have power and can mean as much or as little as you want them to.
