As long as I can remember I have been the type of person that holds a whole lot of regret on her shoulders. I always miss that party that everyone talks about or pick the wrong boys that break my heart. In high school, I did okay. I was vice president of my class, a straight A student, had a decent number of friends, and was an athlete. However, I was never the best at academics nor the star athlete, nor the first person someone would ask to hang out with. I was fun but not the life of the party. I was pretty but not drop dead gorgeous like most of my friends. I was content with my life and that was enough for me because I just kept telling myself that a better time of my life was coming. I convinced myself that my time to shine was college.
My vision of college as a senior in high school was Project X parties every weekend, making out with a new boy every night, having the coolest dorm where everyone hung out, getting in great shape, and having tons of friends. Things didn’t exactly go as planned considering I got a boyfriend (who I love) right before going to college, stopped going to the gym three weeks in, was placed in the oldest and crappiest dorm on campus, made only one friend on my floor, and found out I really don’t love gross frat basements as much as I imagined I would. I ended up going home most weekends and basically hated my freshman year. That was okay though because, again, I kept telling myself next year will be my year.
And again, sophomore year was a little better than the last but not the best time of my life. It was, however, a step up from hating college. I got in to the sorority I wanted, got fantastic grades, went to the mandatory parties that were fun but not super fun, made some pretty great friends (that I was too scared to ever ask to hang out), and went home less. But I still felt like something was missing.
Now here I am, 20 years old, in my junior year of college, wondering if I am wasting too much time being okay with being content. I keep waiting for my time to shine or something to change but I’ve just now figured out that I need to stop waiting for something to change and change myself. Looking back I can see that I have allowed myself to lose two of the best years of my life because I’m too scared to approach that random girl that could have been my best friend freshman year or accept the invitation to that great party that everyone seemed to enjoy so much. I’ve learned that I need to take chances and that people would want to hang out with me if I just asked. So here is to making these last two years of college count and not having any regrets. I will go to every party, take every opportunity I get, and meet as many new people as I can. I will not waste any more time. Life is too short to wait for a better time to come along.
And if I end up just watching Netflix all this year like every other year then maybe next year.
