You Don't Need Him To Be Happy

You Don't Need Him To Be Happy

You don't like him, you like the idea of him
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You don’t like him, you like the idea of him.

Trust me, I know you scroll through the popular page on Instagram and see all these perfect couples. I know you want what you think they have. And that’s why you would give your everything to the first guy that notices you.

I think way too far ahead, like most girls. I don’t know why we do it but even just a simple “hey” makes us think about if we're going to go to your house or ours for Christmas.It drives me crazy and I've realized lately I need to stop worrying so much about the future and enjoy the present.

All my life, I’ve been single because I haven’t met someone worth it all. Until I met the guy who changed my whole perspective on the world.

He treated me so well I didn’t even know I could be treated that good. I realized that it wouldn’t work out between us for different reasons, and instead of staying in the relationship just because I’ve wanted someone my whole life and I had finally found someone who treated me well, I got out of it because I realized I deserve someone who wants to commit and someone who isn’t afraid to lose me.

I made myself believe that he could be the one. I made myself believe that he felt the same way. But he didn’t. I was just another girl to him, while to me he was my future.

I don’t date in this generation just to “date”. I date to marry, and I take it seriously. I want someone who is looking for the same, and he wasn't it. He couldn’t commit to me and that’s okay. And it's okay to leave the relationship because of that. Ladies, you deserve a guy who is 110% down for you, not someone who is unsure if he even sees a future with you.

I know it's easier to stay with him because he makes you happy, and you think that all those times make up for the fact that he won’t commit to you. And it may be easier, and less heartbreaking at the time. But it won't be worth it. You can't force a relationship, and you can't force someone to have the same feelings for you.

What you can do is wait until the right guy comes.

Don’t go looking for a relationship or forcing one, let the right person come to you. You'll find him, trust me. And when you do, fall in love with him... not the idea of him. The right him. The one who is crazy about you and the one who shows you off, and most importantly the one who really gets you and isn’t afraid of loving, and most importantly, losing you.

You don’t need him to be happy.

You don’t need him to feel satisfied.

And you definitely don’t need him because everyone else has a “him”.

I never dated in high school. Not because I didn’t like anyone, but because I chose not to. When I date I am honestly looking for my someone. I knew no one in high school was going to be that someone for me. Some people found their person in high school, and that’s amazing. But for me, it hasn’t happened yet and I’m on my second year in college. And that’s fine.

I thought going to college was going to be amazing and I would find my future husband and we would live happily ever after. I was totally wrong.

Our generation isn’t worried about dating, or even about the future. Don’t get me wrong; there are a few exceptions, like myself. I look around at all these couples and think, are they really happy together, or are they just together because everyone else has someone too? I don’t to let my happiness to depend on a boy. You should learn to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else. Having someone is just the icing on top, and loving yourself is what really matters.

And I'm not only speaking for girls, guys: you don’t her to be happy. I know all of your buddies have someone and it can be embarrassing or lonely if you don’t. But don’t settle for easy, find the girl that is worth fighting for. She will be worth it. You deserve the best, and nothing less.

Most importantly, be happy with yourself, learn to love yourself and know how to be single before you get in a relationship. Don’t depend on a guy to make you happy or fill the hole you might have from past relationships, do it yourself. You don’t need him, and he doesn’t deserve you until he shows he's afraid of losing you.

Cover Image Credit: Brooke Viger

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Want To Be A Better Boyfriend? Try These 5 Tricks

4. Listen to her.

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Some days, it seems like girlfriends are constantly asking for more, and while they may be annoying, there are a few simple ways to stop her nagging and win her praise.

1. Pay attention to her.

I promise you, she is dropping hints every day. These may sound like "Awh, look at all the pretty flowers" or "I haven't been to Boba House in so long!"

2. Plan dates. 

Text her while she is at school or work, and tell her to be ready when you get home or by a certain time. Give her an idea of how dressed up she should be, but don't tell her where you're going. Then, take her to her favorite restaurant, one she's mentioned lately, or to a new movie she'd been looking forward to!

3. Pick up small gifts for her.

This doesn't have to be anything expensive, but next time you're at the grocery store pick up her favorite candy, or a small flower bouquet. Just something little that will show her you were thinking of her when you weren't together.

4. Listen to her. 

Ask about her day, and when she tells you what Sarah did at work, ask her the next day or a few days later if things got better. Take interest in her life and remind her occasionally refer back to old topics to prove you do listen.

5. Get her involved in your interests.

It doesn't all have to be about her! Ask her to watch the game with you, or to go out with you to hang with your friends. She wants to be just as involved in your life as she wants you to be involved in hers!

At the end of the day, every relationship is different. Take this advice as vaguely as needed, and learn your partner and what they expect from you! Happy dating! :)

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7 Tips How You Can Be Just Like Nicole And Find Your Own Carlos

Don't we all wish for our own Prince Charming?

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Don't we all wish for our own Prince Charming? One lucky lady at the University of Calgary in Canada got hers! Twitter has been blowing up with the story of Carlos Zetina, a University of Calgary student who met a woman named Nicole at a local bar on September sixth. After Carlos helped Nicole and her roommate get home safely, Carlos didn't get her last name and Nicole accidentally gave him the wrong number.

Carlos was distraught.

Carlos was so smitten with her, he sent a mass email to every Nicole, or variation of Nicole, at the University of Calgary – all 247 of them. The Nicoles united, formed a Facebook group and Nicole was found. Allegedly, Nicole gave Carlos the wrong number because she is an exchange student from Holland and hasn't memorized her new Canadian number yet. Carlos got Nicole's real number and they are going on a date next week, according to Fox News.

Meanwhile, while Nicole is so lucky to literally have a Prince Charming chasing after her, we're her chasing after men who don't give us the time of day. So, in order to meet your personal Prince Charming, I developed a few tips:

1. Don't go searching

search

Did Cinderella go to the ball with the intention of meeting the prince? No, she went to wear a pretty dress and to explore the castle. If so much of our time is spent consumed with trying to find someone, we may miss out on something great. Instead, just live your life and the right guy will show up at the right time. You don't need to be on the prowl for your next guy, just live life and eventually you will find each other. Finding someone shouldn't be like clothes shopping, it should be like taking a stroll in the park with friends – by being happy, living in the present and waiting for the right timing.

2. YOU know what YOU want, so don't settle for less or other people's opinions

opinion

Ultimately, the only person who knows what is best for you is you. Cinderella knew what she wanted, and she didn't listen to the evil stepmother and evil stepsisters when they tried to stop her from meeting the prince. Strive for someone who meets all of your expectations and qualifications, because ultimately, you know yourself better than anyone. Everyone deserves a love that makes them the happiest person on Earth, so don't let other people's opinion get in the way.

3. Use your past relationships to learn from, not bash

Couple

There is nothing I hate more than girls or boys who trash their ex. I know that sometimes breakups result in heartbreaks, but each relationship allows us to realize what we want and what we don't want. Don't think of your ex as an enemy, think of them as an opportunity to learn. When we examine them this way, we're able to grow as a person in such a better way than if we trash them.

4. In order to find a Prince Charming, YOU must be a Cinderella

kind

How can you find a Prince Charming if you are an evil stepsister? Cinderella is kind, compassionate and loyal even in the worst of circumstances. She's someone we can all learn from. No one is perfect, but we can strive to be the best person we can always be. To get an amazing man, you should strive to be an amazing woman.

5. Find your own fairy godmother

godmother

Who would Cinderella be if she didn't have Gus, Jaq, and her fairy godmother? Find people who strive to make you the best person you can be and who are always there when you need them. This person can be a friend, a professor, your parents, your siblings or anyone that is a shoulder to lean on. Who knows, they may even lead you to your prince charming!

6. There's going to be roadblocks

i quit

In real life, we do have our own evil stepsisters and evil stepmothers. These people can bring us down and make us question who we are. They may block you from realizing who your prince charming is because of the negativity they bring, but don't let that damper your smile. Challenges in life just make us stronger. Remember, you've got this, princess!

7. He may be a prince, but he ain't perfect

cinderella

Sometimes, Cinderella puts us in this fairytale-mindset where we think men should be perfect. News flash, men AND women are far from it. Instead of questioning if he's your prince because of a mistake or quality he has, realize that he will make mistakes and there will be hard times. Fairy dust doesn't really exist, so realize that bad things may happen and it's up to you and your significant other to get through it.

To read more about Carlos Zetina's story, visit Fox News.

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