A toxic friend can sometimes be hard to spot. They don't always have the obvious trademarks, like calling you names or being manipulative. In my opinion, any friend that makes you feel worse instead of better is toxic and needs to go.
In this day in age, people have forgotten how to conversate with differing opinions. Instead, it becomes a battle of "I'm right and you're stupid." Especially on Facebook, where everyone is bolder and it's easier to be defensive.
Now, this is bound to happen on social media, with people you barely even know. It's easier to let it go. What about when your "friend" does it? You know, they shoot down your opinions, convinced that they are always right when you two talk. What about when this friend is kind and generous any other time, but when you disagree with them they become condescending and mean?
Or maybe you do agree with them, but you don't know as much as them on the topic. If they take on a superficial tone or they belittle you, then that is a toxic trait. More often than not, people that do this have a "superiority complex." This means that they secretly have deep seeded insecurity and act like a know it all or like they are better than everyone they know, to cope.
The fact is that people that don't know how to discuss differing opinions without having a haughty "you all are beneath me and I'm smarter than you" attitude are immature. They lack a vital life skill and this is something they have to work on to make it in the real world. Not everyone is going to agree with them all the time, and there's only so many heads you can bite off before people start keeping their distance.
It's horrible when a friend does this. It makes you feel inferior around them, and you should never feel that way around someone you choose to spend time with. If anyone is going through this, listen to my words. Your toxic friend is not smarter than you, and they are not a better person than you. You are on the same level and if they keep trying to rise above, say goodbye!
Don't become your toxic friend. Always be someone who can talk to all people, and hear their ways of thinking without marking them as wrong. You might not agree, but hearing different ideas helps you grow as an individual and in maturity. Too many of our problems in this world are because people listen to respond, instead of listening to understand.
For example, I consider myself pro-choice. I consistently speak with people who are the opposite. Do I speak to them as though they are wrong? No. I ask why they feel that way, and acknowledge respectfully that I don't agree. We shake hands and move on! Often times though, I see that conversation get ugly. We need to learn how to talk to each other again.
If you are guilty of being toxic, chill out and listen to people. Do not shame or bring down someone who might not do things your way. It's not worth losing a friend because you have the thwarted belief that you are always right in your opinions and everyone else is lesser than you. Even if you don't think this, you may act like it.
Take a step back and evaluate. Ask, would I feel bad if I was spoken to this way? Would I feel this person is being unnecessarily argumentative? If you say yes, then there's some growth that needs to happen. No one is right 100% of the time. And above all, be the healthy friend.
