I closed my eyes and sipped on my water. My face flashed a hot red.

“Don’t be a sorority girl”, my coworker said again, like it gave her a bad taste in her mouth.

I bit my tongue.

“Literally,” she continued laughing, “they’re all suuuch,” dragging it out to emphasize her statement, “bitches.”

The word cut the already thick air like a knife.

The background conversations went silent and the people surrounding looked to the ground for comfort. I closed my eyes.

“Bitches,” it replayed in my head.

It was a heavy word, and I could feel the weight of it lingering in the room.

I opened my eyes, she looked at me smiling. I stared back. I was speechless. I had so many thoughts running through my head I didn’t even know where to begin. She turned and walked away before I could organize my thoughts. The conversation was over but there was so much left unsaid.

So, here is the response to her I never got a chance to say.

First off, the sorority girls you’re so harshly talking about, raise over $5 million dollars a year to donate to a range of worthy causes. They spend close to 500,000 hours volunteering in their communities in order to raise that money all while balancing school work, extracurriculars and a social life. And if that isn’t enough, they also give $2.8 million in scholarship, each year. Honestly speaking, I know if I wasn’t in my sorority of girls who motivate each other to raise more and do more, I probably wouldn’t have enough self-motivation to make it such a priority. I also wouldn’t be aware of as many different causes and philanthropies. My sorority sisters opened my eyes to a lot of good that I could do in just the local community I live in, and for that, I believe “bitches” is a word I wouldn't use to describe any one of them.

Second of all, the support I have found in sorority life is, in comparison, close to the same one would find on a small sports team. Except in a sorority, instead of a few teammates to get that support from, there are 100 plus girls ready at all times to be there for you. They have comforted you at your lowest, and at your highest they’ve lifted you even higher. They congratulate you on good grades, and hug you when you maybe could’ve done better. They know you, your flaws, your strengths, your passions, and they accept all of them. This isn’t to say that every girl in a sorority is best friends, that is just an unrealistic expectation of 100 plus girls, but they do respect and support you through anything. This, again, leads me to believe that “bitches” isn’t an accurate description of sorority girls.

And lastly, and most importantly, you don’t know these girls. To make such a harsh statement about girls that you don’t even know is offensive, and sad. Maybe the girl that bumped into you in the bathroom or talked to the boy you liked at the party, never did those things with intent to hurt you. Maybe she was rushing to go find a friend that had a little too much to drink and just accidentally brushed into you, maybe she was talking to that boy about her boyfriend who happens to be his best friend, I have no idea. But the point is, you have no idea either. You have no idea what was happening in her life and to judge her and her sorority by just one moment, to call them bitches because of just one moment, isn’t fair. Imagine someone judged you by just one random moment, imagine they took that one moment and judged all of your friends by it as well, do you trust that you wouldn't be labeled negatively as well?

I am a sorority girl. I am proud of my chapter and my house, as well as my friends’ chapters and houses. We are more than a word that a stranger calls us while passing time at work. We are more than the one moment she judges us for. And we are more than the stereotype people place on sororities.