Greek life is a huge part of the college experience for many people all over the country. People outside of the Greek system (my pre-sorority self included) have almost no knowledge as to how these organizations operate so they tend to take the easy way out and believe whatever they hear. We all know the stereotypes associated with “going Greek” and for those of you who still believe them to be true, I’m here to open your eyes.

I would like to first start out with reminding everyone of a few things:

Not all fraternities and sororities operate the same way.

Not all members of these organizations are the same.

The actions of one person or one organization do not represent that entire population of people.

Now, let’s get to breaking down some of these stereotypes:

1. “Wow you pay for your friends? That’s so sad…”

Ah, my favorite thing to hear. Okay first of all, you can’t pay someone to like you. It just doesn't work. Relationships don’t operate that way. A friendship requires effort from both sides and is (usually) not instant. Being in the same organization helps, obviously, because that automatically gives you something in common with that person but in order to form a real friendship with them you have to actually put in the effort necessary to do so.

2. “You know where all the good parties are, right?”

Actually no, I don’t. Being Greek means people automatically tend to associate you with alcohol/partying/etc. After all, college is one big party, right? Wrong. A lot of people involved in these organizations don’t even have time to go out every night and for those that do go out, parties are nothing like they seem in the movies. The media provides us with an inaccurate depiction of almost every aspect of college life (Greek life included) and that’s all a lot of people end up seeing. The social aspect of Greek life seems very important at times because it helps you connect with members of other Greek organizations and form new connections but it is not the only important thing. Choosing to live a party-oriented lifestyle is a personal choice and has nothing to do with a person’s Greek affiliation. So please don't hit me up for party addresses on a Tuesday night when I'm trying to cram for a psychology exam.

3. “So you only care about your sorority/fraternity friends now? Are you too good for everybody else?”

Nope, sorry. The people I met before I decided to join a sorority are still just as important to me now as they were before I joined and they know that. I still hang out with a lot of the same people that I did before and I never only hang out with one specific group of people, anyway. A person’s Greek affiliation has no effect on how I feel about them or our relationship.

4. “Your parents just pay for everything for you, don’t they?”

Wrong again... and I wish there was a way for me to fully express how angry comments like this make me. I have had a job since I was of legal working age. I work while going to school so that I can afford to pay for things that I want to do. I pay my own dues each month, I pay for my own food, I pay for my own gas and I pay for anything else I need because I don’t expect my parents to pay for something that I chose to do myself. Contrary to popular belief, not all members of Greek organizations come from wealthy families who have rich parents to pay for everything they do. And for those who have parents that do pay their dues, good for you and that's awesome, but that is not the case for most of us.

5. “I feel like a lot of you just pretend to like each other for pictures and stuff… are you actually friends with any of them?”

Why would I ever waste my time "pretending" to care about someone? Joining a sorority has brought into my life some of the most amazing women I have ever met. Of course I’m not going to lie and say that I’m BFFs with every member of my chapter because I’m not by any means. There are a lot of girls that I’m really close to but there are also some girls that I still don’t know very well and that’s okay. You can’t force a friendship on someone and just because I’m not super close to every member of my chapter doesn’t mean I’m not thrilled to have them in my life. I do still care about every single one of them and I’m lucky to have them. I know that even though I may not even talk to some of the girls in my chapter that if I needed something, I could still go to them for help. The whole point of being in this “sisterhood” is to know that you always have these people by your side that care about you and support you in everything that you do.

6. “Do you do anything else besides ‘be Greek’ or…”

Our generation’s fear of commitment makes it seem “wrong” for us to only focus on one thing or one person. Maybe I do only care about my sorority, so what? People make finding something you're passionate about seem like such a negative thing. Stop doing that. For a lot of people, being in a Greek organization is just one thing on a long list of extracurricular activities. In fact, I know my sorority actually encourages us to branch out and try out other clubs and things so that we can really have a “full college experience”. A lot of us are involved in other organizations, have jobs, do volunteer work, play a sport, or are involved in things outside of school completely. And for those of you who are only involved in your Greek organization, that’s totally fine, too. It’s not a bad thing to be passionate about one specific thing and forget anyone who tells you otherwise.

7. “Wow you’re in a sorority so you literally only date frat guys, right?”

Infinite eye rolls… Shout-out to whoever started this ridiculous myth that anyone involved in Greek life is “required” to date within the Greek system. I will date whoever I please, regardless of their Greek affiliation. In fact, in my own personal experience, I prefer non-frat boys anyway (again, no offense to those who feel otherwise). Just like with forming friendships, relationships are all about personal preference, not Greek status.

8. “What’s up with those weird rituals you all do? Like you have those blood ceremonies and do sacrifices in the name of sisterhood and stuff, don’t you?”

Honestly, as ridiculous as this one sounds, I’ve actually heard it quite a lot. Yes, we have special ceremonies. No, there is nothing weird or blood/sacrifice-related in any of them, I promise. The reason we have special rituals is because it’s all part of the tradition of the organization. Each organization has its own ceremonies and rules that it has to follow and that is part of what makes each organization unique. We don’t go around bragging about the contents of our ceremonies because they are private. Only those involved in the organization are meant to experience them because they are supposed to be sacred. Every type of group has special things that only they do whether it be a sports team or a group of coworkers or any other type of group. For Greek organizations, it’s all a lot more private so people automatically assume the worst of it.

9. “Of course you're in a sorority, you totally look like a sorority girl…”

First of all, it really bothers me that this is normally meant to be an insult. You can’t just assume anything about a person by looking at them and even if you could, why would it be such a bad thing to “look like a sorority girl”? Secondly, there is not a specific “look” required for being in a sorority. Of course I think all of my sisters are beautiful, but none of them look any particular way. You don’t have to be blonde or thin or preppy or any of the other stereotypical looks associated with Greek life. All you have to do is be yourself. Every single one of my sisters is unique in their own way and that is what makes being part of this group so amazing. A group of completely different girls who share similar values (and who might not have known each other without the bond that a Greek organization provides) are able to come together and build each other up. It’s such an amazing feeling to be un-apologetically you and just be accepted for the way you are.

And, finally… drum roll please…

10. “What about after you graduate? Will any of this really matter in four years?”

Actually, yes it will. It will always matter. Of course the whole Greek experience is different for every person involved, but the benefits are usually the same. From a professional standpoint, making connections with alumnae who are associated with your specific Greek organization can help you land an internship or even a job when the time comes. Part of job networking is being able to know the right people who can put you in contact with the people you need to know that can help further your career. From an emotional standpoint, the bonds you form with these people don’t just end when college does. The memories you make and the friendships you form with the people in your organization last a lifetime. When I first joined my sorority, I was told that I would meet my best friends and my future bridesmaids and it’s true. I don’t want to ever have to imagine my life without these people and, luckily, I don’t have to. After all: “it’s not for four years, it’s for life”.