I am going to preface this article by saying I do not like jelly beans. Before you discredit my opinion on this, keep in my mind that for the first 13 years of my life I loved jelly beans. One day, I had the worst flavor ever (so bad that I honestly do not remember what it was) and from then on, I refuse to eat jelly beans. As irrational as it seems, I simply cannot eat jelly beans anymore.
1. Black Licorice
This flavor is a hit or miss depending on the person. You literally either hate this flavor, or you love it. I have yet to meet someone who is in between. Either way, the licorice flavor comes from root extracts of the licorice plant. Combine that with some sugar, molasses (for the black) a binding agent (i.e. flour, starch, gelatin) and out comes this sickeningly sweet flavor.
2. Buttered Popcorn
I am not entirely sure what the creators of this jelly bean were thinking when they decided that “buttered popcorn” was a good flavor to market. (Aren’t jelly beans supposed to be “sweet”?) Despite the odd turn off I immediately have at this flavor, buttered popcorn jelly beans are surprisingly awesome! Seriously. Try it if you have not. To top it off, the jelly bean looks as great as it tastes.
3. Lawn Clippings
Okay, so no one ever suddenly gets the urge to go eat your freshly mowed lawn, but I promise you this one is not as bad as it sounds. Out of all the weird and disgusting jelly bean flavors (moldy cheese, anyone?), lawn clippings provides a fresh and clean flavor for your satisfaction.
4. Puke
Gross. Our body literally makes us to puke to remove bad toxins and various things from our systems as a natural defense to keep us healthy. Why eat that? I honestly feel like I am going to be sick thinking about it.
5. Toothpaste
I feel like this flavor could go either way on the good/bad spectrum of jelly bean flavors. All it really tastes like is mint, right? I think it’s a mental circumstance that prevents people from liking this flavor. We know we are not supposed to swallow toothpaste, so having that flavor in your mouth automatically makes you not want to swallow the actual jelly bean. I am nowhere near an expert on this, but that seems like a logical conclusion to draw…right?
6. Skunk Spray
Do I even have to explain why this is a bad flavor? If you have ever smelled a skunk spray, you know how disgusting that is.
I am definitely not discrediting the jelly bean companies. They make some pretty awesome flavors. (Hello, lemon!) Despite the appeal of picking out a mystery jelly bean and taking the chance at whether it is a decent flavor or not, some flavors should not be on the market. At all.
