There is no doubt some men freak easily when having a serious conversation about status, feelings, or relationships. However, sometimes these conversations are super necessary because it is not fair for either one of you to feel lost or confused by what is going on. It is important to be on the same page, and sometimes all that confusion and wondering can only be solved with one thing, the dreaded "what are we?" conversation. This conversation usually goes really well or downhill real fast. We have learned over the past 20 years that some words are like flipping the "freak out" switch with men, so if you can avoid these words hopefully the conversation will go much smoother.
1. "Can we talk?" or "we need to talk"
This sends off warning signals because men think they are about to be criticized for something they said or did (or didn't do).
2. "Wondering" or "thinking"
Men already know women overthink everything, so before having this touchy conversation avoid saying "I've been thinking or wondering" because then men know shit is about to get real, real fast.
3. "Feel" or "feelings"
Feelings tend to freak guys out, and it's not something they're comfortable talking about. So when you start talking about your feelings, they probably won't know how to respond, and we all know they won't tell you how THEY really feel.
4. "Future"
Men don't plan ahead, so when the word "future" is said they usually haven't thought about it yet, therefore they most likely will not have an answer for you.
5. "Relationship" when there isn't a relationship
There is no relationship until the man says there is one. Therefore don't use that word unless he has uses it first, kinda like the L word.
6. "I feel" or "I need"
No one likes clingy and when you say you "need" or "feel" it sends the message that they are not making you happy with what they are already giving you.
7. "Boyfriend" or "Girlfriend"
Unless you both know you are exclusive, those words should not be in your vocabulary.
8. "We" or "us"
These terms make it seem like you have already linked you two as one, therefore defeating the purpose of the "what are we" conversation.
9. "Also" or "Plus"
This single word makes it sound like you will talk for an eternity about your feelings (yes, we used the F word).
