If you know me, you know that I don't tolerate the misuse of the word retarded.

A few weeks ago, I found myself in a conversation with someone about their broken laptop. He was frustrated because it was a simple fix, but it would take a little bit for the piece to come in. He was venting about how this sucked, and that he didn't want to go to the library to work on his homework. He then said, "My laptop is so retarded."

I was instantly vexed at his choice of words. How couldn't I be? He used the word retarded as an insult, as well as comparing people with mental deficiencies to this broken object.

After a few minutes of being upset, I asked him why he chose that specific adjective? Why did he use the word 'retarded' to describe the broken machine? He responded apprehensively and a bit embarrased saying that he didn't know. I then asked him what's another word he would use to describe his laptop besides "retarded"? He answered bashfully with "stupid," "annoying," and "useless."

I looked at him, and asked "Why would you choose those words, in comparison to the word retarded?"

He looked at me with confusion as I continued to explain to him my thoughts.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines the term retarded as, "slow or limited in intellectual or emotional development or academic progress."

This term isn't meant to be used towards anything but people. Because objects don't have intellectual or emotional development and in using "retarded" in reference to objects deliniates people with mental retardation to a lower degree of personhood.

Where my frustration lies in regards to this entire issue, is that when asked other words to describe the thing he called retarded, he chose words like, "stupid," "annoying," and "useless"- of all things. So in some sense, he finds those three words synonymous with the word retarded.

But that's the thing, being mentally retarded does NOT mean that you are stupid, annoying and useless. In fact, it means nothing close. It's a mental deficiency, that people have no control over.

We all know someone who has a mental deficiency. Whether it's someone you know of, a close friend, or even a

family member- we know or will know someone. For me, it's my mother
When I was younger, I was taught that: "Mommy isn't like other Moms" and "She has the mind of an eight year old." In reality, she was diagnosed with mental retardation. Even with that, she is a normal person like you and I.

So next time you think about using the word retarded, replace that object with my mother. So instead of this laptop is retarded, say Carolyn is retarded. Then switch out the word retarded with one of the three words my friend gave me.

Carolyn is stupid. Carolyn is annoying. Carolyn is useless.

My mom may be mentally retarded, but she is none of these.

What I wish people would understand, is that when they use the word 'retarded' to insult something, their insulting my mother. And somebody else's brother, cousin, grandparent and best friend. If you know me, you know that I don't tolerate the misuse of the word retarded... and now you know why.