Contrary to popular belief, gender inequality does exist, but not in the way that you would think. As Donald Trump so eloquently pointed out in his speech last Wednesday, women have something that men just don’t have: the Woman Card. Not only is this Woman Card the ticket to Hillary Clinton’s political success thus far in the presidential race, but women have been reaping benefits from their women cards for centuries.
Unfair? You be the judge: here are some things that women get with their Woman Cards that men don't.
The Wage Gap
Because apparently when female employees flash their Woman Cards, employers see a 25 percent off coupon on their paychecks.
The Pink Tax
With the Woman Card comes pink and unnecessarily gendered products. Who cares if said products are suspiciously more expensive than the products aimed towards men? They're so cute!
Luxury Items
Women with vaginas are just rolling in luxurious menstrual products. We don't actually need them, we just buy them for the fun of it!
Dress Codes
Apparently the Woman Card makes us such naturally beautiful, sensual creatures that the mere sight of our exposed knees or collarbones are able to send men into a frenzy.
Free Drinks
Show the bouncer your Woman Card along with your ID at a bar and free drinks will practically be thrust into your hands, even if you don't want them!
Open Doors
I don't even remember how to open a door by myself anymore, they can just sense my Woman Card from ten feet away and automatically open in front of me.
Free Compliments
Ladies, you know what I mean. You’re walking down the street, minding your own business, when a nice man hollers something sweet and uplifting at you, like “Nice jugs!” or “Ayyy
baby girl lemme hit that!” Just like that, your whole day is made! Thanks, Woman Card!
Children
We all know that with every Woman Card comes the desire to stay at home and raise children, so employers give women slower tracks to promotions and less and less pay with every child they do have, making it easy for them to justify staying at home. Besides, even if a woman does choose to continue working, the kind people in her life will ask, "But, if you're working, who is going to take
care of your children???" showing that they are just as concerned about them as she is. How sweet!
Jealous yet? Here: get your own Woman Card.
