I'll just come right out and say it - I don't believe that men need to pay for everything. It doesn't matter if it's a date, me getting my nails done, or concert tickets for a show that's still months away. Men do not need to shell out money for everything. In 2019, women work and secure the bag just as well as any man and hustle just as hard, if not even harder.
I like to treat my man.
I love planning surprise dates and taking care of buying some things so he doesn't have to worry about it. There are some weeks where I make more money and some where he makes more. We decided to split the things we buy because we feel our relationship is one of partners and equals.
Whether it's just taking him out to dinner, buying him that new game he loves, or the t-shirt I saw him staring at, I love having the power and the ability to contribute to the relationship just as much as he does.
I like to be pampered.
I love when I'm sitting at a restaurant and my boyfriend grabs the bill, telling me he'll take care of it. I mean, wow. I swear, sometimes my eyes turn into giant hearts and I smile at him without shame. Being in a relationship means putting everything you have on the table and laying it all out there.
One of the biggest problems in our generation is that we all expect to be treated like princesses and queens and have a boyfriend who will give in and buy us everything we want. We want everything and more from this man but won't treat him as well as he treats us.
You need to be able to all of that for him in return.
If you want to be treated like a queen, then you need to realize that you need to treat your boyfriend like a king.
Reciprocity in a relationship when it comes to finances is one of the most important parts of it. Where money is concerned, communication needs to be open and you have to be honest with the person you're with. There are going to be weeks where you just don't have the money to go out.
This happened to me once. My card information was stolen and fraudulent purchases were made on my card. I had to lock down my account and wait until my new card arrived. I quite literally had no money. I explained to my boyfriend what was going on and apologized because I knew we had a day trip planned. All he said was, "I got it."
When I was unable to, he picked up the bill and paid for things so that we could go out and enjoy our time. And one time a while ago, when he was still in school and his hours got cut back a bit by his job, I picked up the bill so he could save the money he did have.
Everything we do, we do as partners. Fair and equal, we make sure the other is taken care of.
Men, thank you for the years and years and years of picking up the check, but letting your woman pay does not make you less of a man. It makes you someone's partner.