It always seems like it is the easy way out, to pretend nothing ever happened. Pretend we are okay and put a smile on our face, that way we won’t have to deal with the pain we are going through. When faced with living a life as a war veteran, women often suffer inwardly to put their family, friends and even themselves, at ease. The article "Women at Arms" by Damien Cave discusses the issues that women who suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder deal with every day. Women who choose to hide from their painful issues in everyday life are only prolonging their recovery. Instead of deciding to seek help and let others in on their inner darkness, these women are going on with their lives as if nothing changed which prevents them from beginning the process of healing.
Women who take the bold risk to fight for our country are faced with rape and sexism, not to mention the possibility of death each and every morning they wake up. About one in five women in the military will report experiencing sexual trauma while serving their country (as opposed to one in 100 men) according to the United States Department of Veteran Affairs. Once they return home, women are expected to go back into their daily routines without difficulty; throughout time women have always been regarded as nurturing figures. It is not thought that women might need someone to care for them instead. Women, who choose to avoid their issues and hope they disappear over time, aren’t receiving the proper treatment they need to cope with post-traumatic stress disorder. The United States Department of Veteran Affairs suggests that, “When you have PTSD, dealing with the past can be hard. Instead of telling others how you feel, you may keep your feelings bottled up. But talking with a therapist can help you get better.”These women are putting themselves through the agony of living their lives in fear and depression, when simply admitting that they are struggling will initiate a fresh start.
When some people struggle, they choose not to let those around them know. Believing that letting their friends and family know that they are not “OK” will just make matters worse. “Women are typically expected to snap back into domestic routines without any trouble,” says Damien Cave. Women feel they have an obligation to go on as if nothing has changed their lives. They sweep their personal struggles under the rug for the sake of their loved ones. What they do not realize is that they are creating a greater burden for themselves in the future. When women ignore the problems they are facing with PTSD, they tend to lash out toward those closest to them. The issues many women face while out in combat scar them, and if we add the trauma of sexual abuse by their fellow troops, we understand how these aspects of military service create distance between themselves and their families who cannot possibly understand what these women have been through. According to Cave, “Some psychiatrists say that women do better in therapy because they are more comfortable talking through their emotions, but it typically takes years for them to seek help.” Without telling anybody that they need to receive treatment, these women’s symptoms worsen and they begin to resent their once noble act of fighting for our country.
Female veterans returning home from war are faced with sexism, yet again. Many ignorant people do not realize that they were out fighting, and question the validity of their PTSD, further causing women to feel worse and second-guess themselves. Surrounded by many doubting figures, they try hard to avoid appearing even weaker to those who already do not believe in them. Constantly faced with opposing forces, women have to stand up and fight for their mental health and stability. In an article published by the United States Department of Veterans Affairs, psychologist Diane Castillo speaks of a patient of hers, “In the beginning, she was ambivalent about discussing the rape…She simply wanted to avoid focusing on the incident. Avoidance is a classic feature of PTSD. Also, she felt embarrassed, and guilty. She blamed herself for ‘allowing’ the incident to happen.” The sooner women choose to step up and get the help they need, the better. Women, just like men, have every right to the proper treatment of PTSD.
Gender does not differentiate the susceptibility of the pain and suffering a war veteran is faced with. Whether it is the constant doubt they are forced to put up with from those around them, or the doubt they have in themselves, female veterans should have no obstacles between them and seeking out the assistance they need. This not only applies to women at arms, but also to anyone who feels the need to bury the issues that hold him or her back. We all need to take the time to remind ourselves that we are worthy of getting the help we need and have faith in those around us to help us to be the very best we can be, no matter what struggles we are faced with.
