This isn’t to bash you, but in a way, it’s a thank you.

Thank you for being my constant letdown. Thank you for being the embarrassment in any public spot we went to. You were controlling, you played mind games, and you were just everything you wouldn’t be.

We had days where you were the funniest and happiest person to be around. Then one day, you decided drugs were more important. That two-hour high was all you cared about.

You pushed me to fall into depression. I never fell for your way, though. You were everything I never wanted to be.

Partying, drinking, and smoking were some things I never found fun. But that was right up your alley.

Heartbreak is a different type of feeling when it comes to fighting for someone with a drug addiction. Drugs are toxic. YOU are toxic.

Let’s rewind to about six months ago, you being drug-free and happy. When we were happy... I used to enjoy spending time with you. I used to be in love with you. You made my days brighter.

But now? You only make your days brighter by flicking a lighter.

I feel sorry for you — and I truly mean that. I blame myself for it. I blame myself for letting you go down this path. How could I not see this coming?

I miss seeing your eyes sparkle when your smile would reach your cheeks. I miss being the reason why you smile. I miss being with you more than anything.

But like I said before, you only care about the flick of that lighter and the blunt between your lips.

So this is my goodbye; this is much harder for me than it will ever be for you.

Watching you go through and down this path is actual torture. I wish you the best, and hopefully a fast recovery.