Mental health can be a touchy subject to those who suffer from a mental illness. It may be because some of our loved ones just do not understand how to properly "take care" of situations we may be in. I have created a list of what I would like my parents to know about my mental illness.
1. Let me know you are supporting me and behind my fight, but don't be overbearing to the point that it causes my anxiety.
Almost everybody appreciates love and affection, however, don't make it seem "fake" to us.
2. If you want to know something, ask, but don't be offended if I don't want to tell you.
It might be triggering in that moment and I don't want to be set off.
3. Communication is key
But know that you don't know exactly how I feel, so don't try to act like you do.
4. Don't act like this will pass and it'll all be better soon.
This goes for fights, disagreements, or even the highs or lows in my depression.
5. Don't talk to me like I have a defect.
Please don't talk down to me like I don't understand what is going on, it will make me shut down and not want to
6. By telling you my problems, I don't expect you to fix them.
I just need someone to vent to, but that doesn't mean I want advice at the end of it. I just need to get stuff off my chest.
7. Just because you can't see my pain, doesn't mean it isn't there.
It feels like I'm withering away some days.
8. Mental illness hurts just as much as a physical illness does.
There are days that I can't get out of bed, because it hurts too much.
9. Be conscious about what you say around me.
Don't tiptoe around what you say, but learn trigger words.
10. Lecturing about the problem, won't make it better.
If anything it makes it worse. Same goes to when you push to talk about a topic that I'm not comfortable talking about at that point in time.
11. Reaffirm your love and support for me.
But don't make it seem like a chore. Do it at random times, when you think I need it the most.
12. Be patient, it frustrates me too.
I am most likely more frustrated than you.
13. Make me feel like it's okay to make mistakes.
Being on edge makes it wors.
14. I need consistency.
Consistent love, support, encouraging messages, anything will help.
15. Don't compare me to stories or someone else you know with my mental illness.
Everybody is different, so don't compare or say "well this worked for so-and-so." Chances are, it won't work for me.
16. Just because my voice raises or cracks during argument doesn't mean I'm getting hysterical.
It means it's killing me even more inside to fight with you. It makes my fight to stay here that much harder.