I have been told by many that I set my standards "too high" for a partner to be able to meet while I am "in college" and should be "dating for fun". To me, the purpose of dating is to learn what you would like and dislike in a life partner; however, I already have a solid amount of expectations from my future partner, as well as myself. While I do not have everything figured out to a T, I know that I will not until I meet the person who does fit in a relationship with me well.

I believe that no one has the right to tell you what your standards should be. Set them as high as you would like, because while every individual you may find attractive may not meet those standards, you will be thankful for the day that you find one, or more, of those individuals that do- and I guarantee that you will.

Here are a few of the reasons why I believe that you should not "settle".

Often, expectations are values based; therefore, if you choose to invest time in someone whose core values differ from your own, you may run into serious conflicts.

I for one demand respect from a partner before all else, as one of my core values is to treat yourself and others with kindness and respect. It is so important to know that what your mind tells you matters alongside your eyes and heart are saying.

However attractive you may find an individual, it does not mean that they are the right person for you.

Why? Physical attraction is not all that matters in a relationship. Of course, it may seem like an important factor in the brink of a relationship, or 'talking'; however, long term relationships require more. I like to think of certain traits as a wish list. Yet, what I find to matter most is the non-negotiable traits. There is a list of 'needs' I have in my mind that I would like to find in a partner. While it isn't exactly short, it is general and reasonable:

- They are kind to others

- They are honest, trustworthy, and faithful to me and their loved ones

- They must have ambition about their goals in life: have passion about the path they see themself on

- They must have effective communication, or constantly work to have it

- They must be willing to compromise and understand that a relationship should be equal and fair

- They must bring positive energy, and be open about when they are having a hard time remaining positive through hardships

- They must have their own life with their own interests, and understand that I have mine as well

- They must be someone I feel that I am safe with

- They must be seeking employment in their future, or studying to pursue a degree for their future career

Once these needs have been met for myself, then I allow myself to evaluate my wish list, and how they fit into my extra interests that are not a 'must have', but would be nice.

Understand that if you are in a relationship that does not meet your standards or your partners, it is okay to walk away.

I have the mindset that dating is a trial and error process until you find someone that you are most compatible with to spend your life with. While it may be unpleasant to think about break ups, it is all part of the process. It may be painful, but with love, you have to take that risk. So, understand going into a relationship that it may not be your last, and know that it is okay.

If you hold yourself to a certain standard, it is only fair you hold a set of standards you expect from a partner as well. Would you settle for less from yourself? If not, then why would you choose to settle for less from someone you may spend the rest of your life with?