I’ve always hated the guy in the rom-com who let the fear of commitment ruin his shot at a happily ever after with the perfect girl. Annoyed with the child in that one episode, where due to his broken childhood, he couldn’t accept love. Never could stand the girl who’d never let herself get too attached. I never thought I could be like those people. Self-sabotaging themselves from happiness, from people who truly love them. Nope, that's not me.

She invited me over that day and told me she liked me. My heart skipped. I had wanted to hear those words for 7 months. Why did I want to run as soon as I heard those words though? My chest got a little heavy, everything suddenly became more... real.

After playing the situation over in my head for the 100th time, I had compiled a list of all the reasons why we wouldn't work out. I came to the conclusion that we had polar opposite personalities, and it just wouldn't work. Ironically, this is the reason why the girl turned me down months ago. I remember thinking that was baloney and that two different puzzle pieces fit together, the same shape pieces can not. Multiple times throughout the semester, I thought about asking her out again... why was I running now?

It hit me. Fear has been trying to dictate my life. Here is some reflection:

1. I hate anything before I actually do it.

2. I don't like people at first impression.

3. I tried to transfer after my first semester at Texas Tech.

4. I won't get any more tattoos centered around Christ, because of the "what if" that I won't feel the same about Him in the future.

Okay, I realized I probably have some commitment issues.

I hated football so much in middle school that my dad bribed me with money to play. I would not be the man I am if I did not play high school football. The summer camp during which Jesus revealed so much of his character to me, I wanted to quit during orientation week. My best friend to this day, I low-key hated for over a year. My first semester at Tech, I begged my parents to transfer schools... I was over the cowboy boots. But I fell in love with Jesus at Tech, have the type of friends I never thought I would have, and the memories I have here are so rich. Texas Tech is home.

I love tattoos. There is just something about loving in permanent ink that is brave and romantic.

I love Jesus so much. I know His word to be true. I know He is the only solid foundation I can count on in this life. My family, my friends, my fraternity, my church, my career... all these things will fail me, but Christ will not because He is faithful. He has loved me through the good, the bad, and the really ugly. He has shown me that there is nothing I could to lose his love.

So what am I scared of?

Fear is a lie. It's a lie spoken from Satan's lips. Whispering to me that I will fall out of love with Jesus eventually. I SCOFF. Falling out of love with the creator of the universe? The one who has designed the stars in the sky, who has created the oceans I so furiously love? His creation speaks to His never-ending beauty and His mind is one I will never be able to comprehend. I will never be bored. There is always more to love, more beauty to his character that is just waiting for me to find.

It's all a lie. There is no fear in love.

So let what comes, come. Who knows what happens after graduation? (I do, because I'm too type A for that, sorry) What will happen when you move to the new big city? Are you ready to actually be married? What if you don't perform well in the new job? What if, What if, What if?

I don't know! I don't know what tomorrow brings, but what I do know is that Jesus will be there. That He goes before us and promises us that He will finish the good work He started in us, till the day He returns.

So no more fear, no more running.

I'm gonna date the girl, and let the unknown be the unknown.