There's an overbearing elephant in the room when it comes to "defining the relationship." Our generation fears commitment. There is no denying it, and there is definitely no hiding it. But why? What's so bad about coming home to someone you love every night?

I can't say I'm not guilty of dodging commitment, because I am, but I think there is a specific reason for that. Committing to another human being takes time, and a lot of effort. Not only are you giving them that, but you're giving a part of yourself to someone else. Trying to balance school, a job, a relationship and probably fifteen other things can get tough. We're lazy, we're broke, we're selfish, and the last thing we want to be doing is spending the little money we have on someone else. I guess you could say I've deemed myself "undateable."

Now, to get to the real point of this article, which is why people can commit to inking their skin forever, but they can't seem to hold a stable relationship. I have four tattoos and counting, and I've never been in a relationship. I like to tell myself it's because guys are a**holes – granted, sometimes they are – but there have been plenty of nice guys who would have given me the world. I push people away when I feel myself growing too fond of them. I push them away before they can push me away, which is pretty twisted (but all too common) logic.

A tattoo is a piece of artwork, it's an inanimate object on the surface of your flesh. So when my family asks me why I can put those awful tattoos on my body but I can't seem to find someone to date, I assume the answer is obvious, but I guess dating was different when they were young.

The honest truth as to why I'm "undateable" is that I'm terrified. I'm terrified of falling deeply in love with someone, and then turning around to see they stuck a knife in my back. Metaphorically, of course, but I would much rather feel the poke of a needle in my skin.

The mandala on my foot and the roman numerals on the back of my neck can't just decide they don't want to be a part of my life anymore. There are men and women with tattoos all over their bodies, arms, feet, chest – everywhere, but they're still unfaithful to the people they date. I don't support cheaters, but do you ever wonder what makes them that way? That person was so desperately in love with you that they would've given up a lung if it meant saving you, but you couldn't even give them your loyalty. No matter how in love you claim to be, you'll still push them away.

I'm deathly afraid that I'll move across the country to be with the man of my dreams, build a life with him, pick out names for the kids we talked about having one day, only to wake up to an empty bed and a note on the kitchen table reading, "I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry." I think that's what we're all afraid of, whether we admit it or not.

"Doesn't getting tattoos hurt, though?" They do sometimes, but the pain is short-lived. It lasts minutes, maybe an hour. Plus, the ending result in getting that artwork done is usually worth it, and that's why most people don't mind putting up with the pain for a little while.

But when it comes to losing the person you once considered to be the stars in your universe, there is no happy ending. There isn't an ocean themed illusion on your right forearm, or a back piece that looks really cool when you wear a swim suit. There's just a person with a broken-heart, writing sad songs and eating ice cream by the gallon in bed.

So maybe our problem isn't the commitment, but the risk associated with it. The agony from a broken-heart will kill you long before the needle in a tattoo gun does.