I can already feel it. There's something special about this year. And no, it's not just the fact that the biggest snowstorm of the year began the first day of Spring, although that's pretty whacked, too.

No, there's something about this year, I can just feel it in my bones. Maybe it's the fact that my anxiety has literally decreased from 100 to almost 0. Even on the worst days. Maybe it's the fact that I started the year off doing things that I love. (Hello, track season!) Maybe it's the fact that my lowest grade is a B+ right now, and I'm seemingly headed for 4.0 status.

All of these things are building me up right now to be the best person that I can be, and I couldn't be proud of myself- how hard I'm working, how much effort I'm giving everything, my newly found ability to stop negative, anxious thoughts, before they even reach my brain.

I truly feel like I've been giving it all my 100, even more so. But don't get me wrong, please do not. You know, I have some bad days. Some really bad days, you know the ones, where I feel like the world is simply coming to an end and nothing is ever gonna get better. But what counteracts those is these other days I've been having- the ones where I feel like I'm walking on water.

I'm coming to realize that just about anything is possible. Like my grandma always says to me, "If you put your mind to it, you can do anything." Grandma's also the one that says she wants to see me become Valedictorian before she dies.

So yeah, grandma, maybe she's a little unrealistic, but she's not all that out there. In fact, I am so grateful for her and the wise words that she's given me. I used to not really understand that saying about putting your mind to it. But, then I read Moby Dick and I realized that if I can analyze the symbolism of a white whale, I can pretty much analyze just about anything.

If you want something badly enough, you will stop at nothing to achieve it. Nothing can get in your way when you have that passion, that energy and that desire. And maybe that's what's been keeping me on my grind this year.

I made a promise to myself this past November when I turned 16. Everything I do, I'm gonna work the best at it. No matter what I'm doing. I may not be the best, but I will be the most hardworking.

And of course, it's only been, like, 5 months. I am not nearly where I want to be yet. But I believe that I can get there. Every goal I get, once I pass it, I want to go that extra mile. Those extra reps, that extra speed, those extra minutes of studying. Because, why wouldn't I?

For a while, I was so stressed out over nothing. I kept having these continual thoughts, "why am I here? What's my purpose? What even is life about?"

Yeah, things just got super deep and philosophical. I'm past that, now, though, because I've created my own philosophy. Maybe there is no correct purpose in life. Maybe there's no meaning at all. So, why not give it our own? I believe that life is about being happy. That's all. Happiness. Now, we all have our own idea's of that- that's why perfection is non-achievable- everybody has their own definition of it. My happiness is being successful and making the people around me proud, as well as making myself proud. My happiness lies in doing what I love and being around who I love.

I think that's the reason that this year is going to be my year- I'm realizing that to change for the better, I've got to put the things I don't like about myself in the past, and focus on my true goal- happiness and success. That doesn't have to be everyone's goal, but for me, it's just who I am.

Life is so short, I said it once and I probably will never, ever stop saying it. I have so many huge goals, and I plan to accomplish every single one. And, I encourage you to do the same!