I've talked to a lot of guys. I'll be honest. Dated? No. Talked...mmm yes.

My parent's find talking and dating to be so confusing, and I use to be one of those people that thought I actually knew the difference. The truth is, I don't, and I'm pretty sure there is no right way to do the "talking" stage.

I'll give you a few pretty good examples.

My ex of a few years ago and I were just talking. By talking I mean, we went on dates, we were with each other the majority of the time, we talked day and night, and we had genuine feelings for each other.

Here comes the confusion,

so what was the difference between that and dating?

Well, I wasn't ready to just have that one person who I was faithful to, and I'm pretty sure he felt the same way. Being in a relationship for me, is pretty serious s*it. I devote everything I have to making our relationship work, so if I feel like I'm not ready for it, I'll put a guy in the talking phase and see if we amount to what I hope we would. I'm not sure about anyone else, but I date someone to eventually marry them. If you don't see yourself being with that person for long term, why would you be with them at all?

I'm not that girl that will jump from relationship to relationship. I know there are quite a few girls out there who will, but me? I'm more of a wait for the right one sorta thing.

Even when you think you may know all you need to about the guy you've been talking to, chances are you don't. It's still that stage where everything is all sweet and dandy, but there are a lot of secrets that the two of you just don't know about each other yet.

Hell maybe your experiences have been different than mine, I don't know. I just found that the longer I postpone the dating stage, the more successful my actual relationships have been because I've managed to keep the one around that I saw a potential future with.

The struggles for me with the talking stage, is everyone has different expectations.

For example,

IS IT OR IS IT NOT OKAY TO TALK TO OTHER PEOPLE WHILE YOU'RE TALKING TO SOMEONE ELSE?!

I've went back and forth between the two, and I really still don't have a good answer. There has to be a reason you're not dating that person yet. Whether it's because you're unsure if it'll work out between the two of you or you want to keep your options open-there's always a reason. Then don't even get me started about the talking stage and the seriously talking-my God it never ends.

Normally there is some lack of communication between the two in this circumstance. It hardly ever works out where you both see eye-to-eye on this. Either yes it's okay...BUT (then a list of reasons why it isn't actually okay) or No it's not okay unless...(then another list of reasons come up as to when it is okay).

It's freaking confusing. I've done this my whole entire life and not once of when I was in the "talking" stage did another person not end up annoyed or irritated. But you have to ask yourself...well we aren't dating, so...?

Maybe I'm just a really horrible person when it comes to dating, or I should say talking.

But I can assure everyone I look at dating as a completely different thing. I'm one hundred percent faithful and honest. I'll help you when you need it the most, even when you don't want it.

I know a lot of people ask why I wouldn't be the same way in a "talking" relationship, and honestly, I try to be as much as I can. I guess I just take it more seriously when I'm official with someone because that's pretty special to me.

To be able to say, "Hey, I don't do this a lot, but I want to only have you and you only have me, what do ya think?" I don't know, for me? Well it goes a long way.

I've been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for almost two years now, and we too, went through that dreaded talking stage. We didn't have the best communication, and occasionally our feelings got hurt. I don't know about you, but I feel like for me it'll always be one big blur of confusion.

But as soon as we were both in a relationship, everything changed for us. We knew we both were 100% ready and serious to commit to only each other. For us, it's worked out beautifully so far.

He taught me that the talking phase really is just a mess, and maybe it would have been better to be up front with one another on day one. Me tell him I wasn't ready for a relationship right away, and maybe then things would have been smooth sailing-then again maybe not.

Regardless here is what I've come up with.

Depending on how great you are at communicating the talking phase may be a bit rough for you. But regardless of who you are, when you find the one that makes you want to jump from the talking phase to the actual dating phase, you know you've found someone pretty special.