After a year in the "real world," I'm done with buzz words telling me I'm the problem with America. I've been a girl for 19 years, stop pandering to me, but I'm done listening. We have to pass the Equal Rights Amendment.
Paid Family Leave
There are three types of currency in the professional workforce. Time, money, and productivity. In my gap year, I've realized that in order for me to practice self-care I need to find a professional and personal balance between the three. For my gap year, I worked as a nanny. Which means I got compensated for taking care of children that weren't mine. In the US there's no federally mandated as paid family leave. So having children becomes part of a sacrifice we make of our time. So is it so surprising when middle and working-class women say enough? There is clear injustice that we have tried to fix with every life of humanity and now more than ever we have the Human Development Index to do so. That's why the strong relationships I have with successful women are focused on financial independence, not wealth.
In our society however that sacrifice of time and therefore money comes from the woman. That's why women are statistically paid so much less than men for the same work. Even if a woman works full-time she's less likely to be to attend business trips, attend extra work meetings or invest more of her time and money into her own career. Thus it often becomes the responsibility of the husband to continue to work and make more money. This is done with the goal that when they get married and have children they can be providers for their family.
However, that's the basis of income equality that modern feminist so ardently resists actively protest today. The idea that a woman is solely responsible for all her choices and therefore has to sacrifice her time and her money for her child while man only has to sacrifice his top his money and not his time. It places sexist expectations and burdens on women.
After the 2016 election, I was on a mission my world became an underwater obstacle course. Filled with gaps I had to fill. At first, it was the achievement gap I personally hate the media more than anything in the world, growing up regardless of what women I knew and loved told me I was ugly and stupid. As I got more mature I've received comments from people I love and respect without judgment. I take their comment on my looks, my demeanor, my activities and a sign of their love. It is important to make the people feel closest to feel special because of that's the only way to show someone you love them. I make it my goal today to have influenced the media in some professional capacity.
Like the delicate, unfunny, female I am, I love Samatha Bee and some old Jon Stewart or, hell, even some Ellen really gets me motivated. My new Netflix favorites is "Black Mirror," like I mentioned before. Those are good if you think you use your phone too much. "Grace and Frankie" is wonderful because there are two age gaps. Grace and Frankie are two older women with gay husbands who come out can get married. The two wives are a mess due to years of either neglect or over consoling. Their children and husbands are all put into free fall because they simply cannot find any control. This is when communication stops and abuse begins.
Knock the House Down
Abuse begins with any kind of obsession. For example, it could be seemingly harmless like, my mom had lots of house plants when she was raising me, that must be how she gaged her independence. Another one could be as simple as I need a good enough job that I can eventually stop working that where my mom is at now that she's an empty nester. Having working mothers who're maternal instinct has been modified to be entrepreneurship.
People have laughed and laughed at the Kardashians for years and years because they seem spoiled and entitled. While their personalities haven't changed they have changed the standard of living for all working mothers by marketing and selling their brand through social media. When Kendall tried to pander with her Pepsi commercial people saw right through it but when she advertises through social media or the modern market place, she is considered desirable and ideal. This is true with any of the Kardashian's they are their own brand companies have to come to them to ask them for work, not the other way around.
When men or people are mean on social media they are only attempting to sway the opinions of women to that women can never receive equal pay for equal work. They will always be an e-girl with a more famous boyfriend or some crazy, rambly, entitled teenager who doesn't like school and will end up broke and alone forever. So yeah I don't care if you think I work too hard, or if you think I'm aiming too high. I want to be as successful as I can in my career and in my life so I am going to stop listening to people I do not trust.
So if you skipped to the end, there are many things women and people can do if they communicate and work together. For example, Donna Pinciotti and her mother, Midge along with Kitty Forman's family go through very different but very relatable life challenges. The men in that show are good examples of misogynistic men supporting a woman they love. Thanks to her predecessors like Mary Tyler Moore or the men from "M*A*S*H" that reacted to end the televising of war because people didn't like the thought of their young sons lives being auctioned off for a better life.
So this year, regardless of your political views, I challenge you to speak to the women you love and trust in your life. Find out their issues and their adversity and find out what you can do. I've noticed that successful women are good leaders because they are good communicators. I am part of the Next Generation Service Corps and it took me becoming part of the cohort, seeing the financial stability I now enjoy to know that a true leader of my generation will be a good storyteller.
After my boyfriend came home and I was awarded a position in my cohort, I began listening to a podcast by two crazy, addicts with piercings and tattoos. These two women are named Karen Killgariff and Georgia Hardstark. They're both crazy successful but have had several career paths ruined by insecurity, addiction, and mental illness. They often argue that a holistic approach is needed that there isn't one good way to live your life. They somehow communicated it to me in two months with 100 podcasts, an audiobook and to be completely honest if I saw that they were able to be successful through their failures. That's something my mom probably tried to show me like 19 million times in different ways.
Since my epiphany, after finishing the book, I wish I had more diverse exposure to people and places and jobs of real people's experiences of becoming a happy person. My transition has been snail pace compared to most but I finally feel like I have the confidence and power to be successful beyond high school. I did this by investing in myself. It wasn't very expensive and I have hobbies, habits, and responsibilities, I hope to continue and give advice about as I grow older and hopefully wiser. I want to learn about women's stories and tell other women. Right now in this social and cultural climate, I feel like I can only trust 50.8% of the United States right now and if you can't understand that, you might be a bigot.