Ever since hitting the dating age in middle school, I have been the single girl surrounded by couples. I've seen the ins and the outs, the ups and the downs. I've been viciously interrogated and given the third degree by every one of my family members about my relationship status. "Why haven't you brought home a man yet?" I am a professional third wheel and have spent all of my Valentine's Days by myself. All of you fellow single people know what I'm talking about. Despite all this, I have never complained about being single. Not once. Seemingly unpopular opinion? It shouldn't be. There are more upsides to being single than most people usually see.
1. Independence
I will probably say this until the day I die: the best thing a person can have is independence. I believe with everything in me that a person should never be completely dependent on anyone. The thing I love most about myself is my ability to be completely independent. I pride myself on it. Almost everyone I know that is in a couple is petrified to be alone. Some of them can't even spend a few hours by themselves. On the other hand, I love being alone. Having "me time" is so important to maintain a healthy relationship with yourself. Putting all of your happiness in someone else's hands is so dangerous because your happiness should not depend on another. If someone else holds your happiness, that means it can be taken away from you. You should be happy with yourself and be able to stand on your own. A relationship should help you grow and prosper as your own person, not take over your entire being. When you're single, you learn to do all of this along with being able to learn who you really are without being dependent on another person.
"True happiness starts within oneself, do not depend on another for total happiness, your entire heart and essence of your being is worth so much more. Always be mindful that a person can destroy you with one single action or sentence when they know your heart is in their hands." — Rashida Rowe
2. Freedom
One of the greatest things about being single is being able to do whatever you want. So many relationship problems are caused by differences of opinions or preferences on who the other is and what they like to do. I watch it happen almost daily with my friends and family. "So and so was hanging all over you in that picture." "Why do you always hang out with so many guys/girls?" "Don't hang out with your friends tonight, hang out with me." When you're single, these things are not an issue. I do not have to answer to anyone (minus my parents) for my decisions and my actions. We single people can hang out with whomever we want, go wherever we please, and most importantly, flirt with whoever we want to. :-)
3. Time
When you're single, you do no have to bend over backwards and be at someone's beck and call 24/7. I have friends who jump and run at the sound of their significant other. All of their time goes to this one person, and they have a hard time managing a life otherwise. In addition to this, every moment they aren't together is spent in constant communication over the phone. Maybe it's just me, but I would have no idea what to talk to them about all day every day. My life isn't that interesting. I don't know what you want out of me. Single people have flexibility with their schedule because you do not have to answer to anyone else. You can do your own thing at all times
4. Space
There is nothing I love more than space. Physical and emotional. Like I said, I would be awful at having to constantly answer to or be with another person. And there is nothing better than lying down in bed at night by yourself. Cuddling? Yeah, no thank you. Why share body heat with someone when you can sleep in extremely obnoxious positions? I have a huge bed at home that I enjoy having all to myself. I take up every inch of the mattress, and I will not apologize for it. Emotionally, I am the worst at sharing my feelings and being close to someone else. Without even realizing it, I keep myself closed off. That never works in a relationship, but we single people have no worries.
5. Saving money
Everyone who has ever once been in a relationship before knows this one. The amount of money you spend on dates alone is ridiculous. Then, on top of that, you have birthdays, holidays and basically anything else that involves leaving your house. When you're single, all of your money belongs to you. I watch my sister painstakingly put a dent in her bank account for her boyfriend. And boys, I don't know how you do it. I would cry if I had to pay for dates and buy drinks at the bar for a mouth that isn't my own. Single life is rewarded with a bigger wallet. How much more convincing do you need?
6. Less emotional stress and drama
I have zero tolerance for drama, especially when it's unnecessary. Sure, we single people have our daily stressors to deal with too, but imagine having extra on top of it? No, thank you. Relationships come with arguments and petty fights. "Why are you doing that?" "Why aren't you doing this?" "You aren't paying enough attention to me." People change and get crazy when they're in love or falling for someone. I understand it, but I like to keep my distance from it. I'm already going to have gray hair by the time I'm thirty, I do not need to speed up the process.
Single life is incredible. It is an experience that is worth living without dreading it. It also is not something to fear. I don't see why more people don't agree. People shouldn't live to find a significant other. Life shouldn't be one big search for love. You should be living for you. Single life allows that. I adore being single. I have no regrets about passing up relationship opportunities or not spending time looking for someone else. I enjoy living every day of my life for me and no one else. I think that is how everyone should be. If you did not see these clear upsides to being single before, I hope you do now. I hope you learn to embrace them and I hope that you love being single as much as I do. I hope you have fun.
