The importance of saying no:

Saying no has been one of the hardest things I have ever done in my entire life. It’s a multitude of things: fear of rejection, and especially the fear that if I say no, I might lose that friendship forever. The fact that I can’t say no, has led me into some rough parts of my life—staying with toxic relationships, and doing favors while I was already spread too thin in my own life.

So why exactly is saying no important:

• -Saying No gives you control over your own life, it is you who decides what you do with your time and with yourself. Being able to say no allows you to always make your own decisions and decide your direction, which in the end is the least you are allowed.
• -It is also a completely liberating feeling, being able to say no. The moment you say no to something is the moment you realize how wound thin you have become. When you can step back and say that you need to spend more attention on your own life, is the moment you realize you should have done this a long time ago.
• -Saying no also goes hand in hand with honestly. Even if you had the whole day open and you’re looking to spend the day on yourself, saying ‘no’ to a favor because you’re too busy is still honesty—you need to take care of yourself first.
• -Saying no isn’t outright rejection—if you say it right—a lot of people see it that way, but that isn’t necessarily true.
• -Other than saying no to be honest to others, you need to say no to be honest to yourself as well.

People don’t like hearing the word ‘no’, something to adapt if you can’t outright say no happens to be a little more difficult in the moment than outright saying no: offering an alternative. It requires more thought on your part, but offering an alternative to your help is a good way to soften the blow, if you’re worried that whoever you’re saying no to won’t take it in stride.