We are all familiar with those people that seem like they are constantly in a relationship. As soon as they break up with one person, they somehow seem to have someone new lined up to be in love with next. I am not one of those people. I’ve only been in one serious relationship before and it was great, but definitely not something I want to revisit again for a very long time. I am an only child. so I am used to being by myself a lot and quite enjoy my solitude. I’m not antisocial in any way, I’m the opposite in fact, but I just really like being independent and I feel like my independence is somewhat hindered when I'm in a relationship. I'm not saying that you can’t be independent at all when you’re in a relationship, but in order for it to be equal, you have to take your partners feelings and thoughts into consideration in pretty much every situation. I like being able to do whatever I want, whenever I want. I like dedicating my time and attention to myself and helping myself grow instead of focusing so much energy on someone else and their needs instead of my own.
Another big reason why I don’t want to be in a relationship for a while is because I don’t really like who I become when I’m in one. I get anxious and insecure for no reason and that’s not who I am. I recently had the opportunity to have a boyfriend again and almost took it, but I realized how frustrating the thought of having someone else and what they were doing constantly on my mind was. A relationship takes a lot of time and effort away from school, your family, friends, and work, and some people are more than willing to sacrifice those for their significant other, but I’m not. I don’t want the stress of having to manage my schedule around another person's. Some people find that to be very selfish and it is, but not necessarily for the wrong reasons. This is a period of life when you go through so many changes, so why not use it to focus primarily on yourself and your future?
By saying that I enjoy my freedom and not being tied down, I’m not trying to imply that I’m being promiscuous or partying my life away, but I do enjoy going out and having fun with my friends. I don’t have to worry about constantly being on the defense against flirty guys or having something be misconstrued and starting a fight. I can just go out and have a good time as I should at my age.
My approach is not for everyone though. So many people love the feeling of having someone else to share their life with, and that’s totally fine; to each their own. It’s just not the way I prefer. Of course, I’ll be with someone again, but for the time being I’m just enjoying living in my twenties and experiencing all that life has to offer me without being tied down.
