Why I'm Not Ashamed to be a Nasty Woman

Why I'm Not Ashamed to be a Nasty Woman

You can't be annoyed at feminism being called feminism when the entire history of the human race is called mankind.
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Feminism has become a term that was been twisted and misconstrued in so many different ways. Many people don't like when an argument is different from their point of view. For example, when the Black Lives Matter group was formed and a week later came the All Lives Matter group; people don't understand that we're not undermining others, we are addressing a problem.

Feminism does not mean we hate men.

Feminism means that I want to be treated equal to a man. I don't want to live my days knowing that I'm being degraded because I'm a woman.

Being a woman does not mean I'm weak.

Why is it that the worst things a woman can be called are "slut", "whore", "bitch", or "skank" while the worst thing a guy can be called is a "pussy" or even a "mangina"? Why is it that being a woman is the worst insult that there is?

You can't be annoyed at feminism being called feminism when the entire history of the human race is called mankind.

While equal treatment is the root of feminism, rape culture is the biggest concern.

Every one out of six women will experience some type of sexual assault in their life time, 28% of them before the age of 15.

We have been taught that we can't wear provocative clothing because that will attract the wrong type of people. That we have to be careful and go out in pairs on a night out so as not to get attacked. That if anything happens, it's our fault.

And the world wonders why rape victims don't come forward.

When you hear a story of a woman being raped, the most common question is "what was she wearing" or "was she intoxicated"? Followed up by statements of "she was asking for it" or "she didn't say no".

If the word yes does not escape my lips, I am not consenting.

Why is it that in today's world, unless we say no that we were the ones who did something wrong? Why is it that men get the free pass?

The men get praised or sympathized with for their amazing academics or skilled athletic performance as if being talented is a free pass for rape.

Nobody ever asks what a woman's rapist was wearing.

I don't want a rap whistle, I want change.

Rape culture and patriarchal values are killing girls while feminism is upsetting white boys on the internet.

If she's too young for her to be wearing "shorts that short", she's also too young for you to be sexualizing her body for wearing them.

I hate when people say "you're a girl, so act like one" as if my vagina came with a terms and conditions manual.

In the words of G.D Anderson, "Feminism isn't about making women stronger. Women are already strong. It's about changing the way the world perceives that strength."

I am proud to be labeled a "nasty woman" because I believe in love, acceptance, equality, kindness, respect and the power of my voice.

I'm proud to be a nasty woman because my body is not someone else's business.

Because I believe that women shouldn't be punished for the actions of someone else.

Because being a female should not mean having to avoid eye contact with men to not draw attention to themselves as a potential target.

Because one day I want my daughter to not have to fear walking the streets or to be afraid of being herself for the fear of others actions. We need to be the generation of women who will teach their sons to act respectfully instead of teaching our daughters to beware.

Because if men and women should be held to the same standards and women can't say something that may hurt a mans feelings, neither should they.

Because we should be equal no matter the circumstances.

Woman need to scream about the importance of feminism to the world until our voices become so hoarse that it's mistaken for a mans and people actually start to listen to us.

The fact that woman need to justify feminism by explaining how it benefits men is the perfect example of why we need feminism.

I believe that the election of Donald Trump has brought forth the fiercest, smartest, toughest generation of ass-kicking women this country could ever imagine.

I'm a feminist, a nasty woman. I've been a female for a long time now. It'd be stupid not to be on my own side.

Our rights aren't up for grabs. Neither are we.

So don't be ashamed or allow people to shame you for being a feminist. It just means you're ready for a world where you matter just as much as a man.

Cover Image Credit: Google

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No, I Don't Have To Tell You I'm Trans Before Dating You

Demanding trans people come out to potential partners is transphobic.
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In 2014, Jennifer Laude, a 26-year-old Filipina woman, was brutally murdered after having sex with a U.S. marine. The marine in question, Joseph Scott Pemberton, strangled her until she was unconscious and then proceeded to drown her in a toilet bowl.

Understandably, this crime triggered a lot of outrage. But while some were outraged over the horrific nature of the crime, many others were outraged by a different detail in the story. That was because Jennifer Laude had done the unspeakable. She was a trans woman and had not disclosed that information before having sex with Pemberton. So in the minds of many cis people, her death was the price she paid for not disclosing her trans status. Here are some of the comments on CNN's Facebook page when the story broke.

As a trans person, I run into this attitude all the time. I constantly hear cis people raging about how a trans person is "lying" if they don't come out to a potential partner before dating them. Pemberton himself claimed that he felt like he was "raped" because Laude did not come out to him. Even cis people that fashion themselves as "allies" tend to feel similar.

Their argument is that they aren't not attracted to trans people, so they should have a right to know if a potential partner is trans before dating them. These people view transness as a mere physical quality that they just aren't attracted to.

The issue with this logic is that the person in question is obviously attracted to trans people, or else they wouldn't be worried about accidentally going out with one. So these people aren't attracted to trans people because of some physical quality, they aren't attracted to trans people because they are disgusted by the very idea of transness.

Disgust towards trans people is ingrained in all of us from a very early age. The gender binary forms the basis of European societies. It establishes that there are men and there are women, and each has a specific role. For the gender binary to have power, it has to be rigid and inflexible. Thus, from the day we are born, we are taught to believe in a very static and strict form of gender. We learn that if you have a penis, you are a man, and if you have a vagina, you are a woman. Trans people are walking refutations of this concept of gender. Our very existence threatens to undermine the gender binary itself. And for that, we are constantly demonized. For example, trans people, mainly women of color, continue to be slaughtered in droves for being trans.

The justification of transphobic oppression is often that transness is inherently disgusting. For example, the "trans panic" defense still exists to this day. This defense involves the defendant asking for a lesser sentence after killing a trans person because they contend that when they found out the victim was trans, they freaked out and couldn't control themselves. This defense is still legal in every state but California.

And our culture constantly reinforces the notion that transness is undesirable. For example, there is the common trope in fictional media in which a male protagonist is "tricked" into sleeping with a trans woman. The character's disgust after finding out is often used as a punchline.

Thus, not being attracted to trans people is deeply transphobic. The entire notion that someone isn't attracted to a group of very physically diverse group of people because they are trans is built on fear and disgust of trans people. None of this means it is transphobic to not be attracted to individual trans people. Nor is it transphobic to not be attracted to specific genitals. But it is transphobic to claim to not be attracted to all trans, people. For example, there is a difference between saying you won't go out with someone for having a penis and saying you won't go out with someone because they're trans.

So when a cis person argues that a trans person has an obligation to come out to someone before dating them, they are saying trans people have an obligation to accommodate their transphobia. Plus, claiming that trans people are obligated to come out reinforces the idea that not being attracted to trans people is reasonable. But as I've pointed out, not being attracted to trans people supports the idea that transness is disgusting which is the basis for transphobic oppression.

The one scenario in which I would say a trans person should disclose their trans status is if they are going to have sex with someone and are unsure if their partner is attracted to whatever genitals they may have. In that case, I think it's courteous for a trans person to come out to avoid any awkwardness during sex. But even then, a trans person isn't "lying" if they don't come out and their partner is certainly not being "raped."

It is easy to look at the story of Jennifer Laude and claim that her death was due to the actions of one bigot. But it's more complicated than that. Pemberton was the product of a society that told him that disgust towards trans people was reasonable and natural. So when he found out that he accidentally slept with a trans woman, he killed her.

Every single cis person that says that trans people have to come out because they aren't attracted to trans people feeds into the system that caused Jennifer Laude's death. And until those cis people acknowledge their complicity in that system, there will only be more like Jennifer Laude.

SEE ALSO: Yes, You Absolutely Need To Tell Someone You're Trans Before Dating

Cover Image Credit: Nats Getty / Instagram

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Donald Trump's Sanctions Toward The Iranian Government Are Giving Us Painful Flashbacks To North Korea

Whether the sanction is effective is uncertain. But just like the North Korean nuclear problem, there will also be an answer soon.

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The recent news is that Iran president Hassan Rouhani is willing to talk with Donald Trump and the American government about newly established sanction towards Iran. Three months ago, Donald Trump announced that the U.S. would exit the Iran Nuclear Agreement and threatened to impose sanctions on Iran nuclear in 180 days. Recently, Trump tweeted what could be seen as a threat to the Iranian government.

Donald Trump wanted to force the Iranian government to change their economic policy. There are a lot of domestic problems in Iran. The Iranian government is busy expanding their power in the Middle East. The government used to support the Syrian government. The Saudi Arabian government and the West, which supported the Syrian Rebels, attempted to stop Iran from interfering with Syria. The Iranian government worried that the Syrian governmental crisis would affect their political stability. The overuse of the financial budget has influenced economics, causing Iranian people to appeal the government to revolutionize.

Compare the North Korean Nuclear Crisis and the Iranian Nuclear Crisis and we can see Donald Trump's similar strategies. Firstly, Donald Trump has put in a lot of pressure of either country to force them to give up the nuclear plan and improve economics instead. In the North Korean Crisis, last year, Donald Trump called Kim Jong Un "rocket man" and Kim Jong Un condemned him "crazy."

After temporary language confrontation, Kim Jong Un gave and was willing to negotiate with Trump beginning in early 2018. As for Iran, Rouhani also laughed at Trump's policy and criticized Donald Trump's sanction to Iran which was not supported by the European Union. But the latest is that Iran officials are still willing to talk to the U.S. In the trade war with China, Donald Trump also exerted the pressure on China in order to negotiate.

Many people dislike Donald Trump. It is undoubted that Donald Trump's sanction has effectively forced the country to open their economy to a larger degree of freedom. In the Kim-Trump Summit, the U.S. government reportedly played a video that assumed the future of North Korea.

In Iran currently, the inflation is so high that the public wants the economics to be promoted and anti-America sentiment is expected to end. As Donald Trump mentioned, the aim of the sanction is not to overturn the Iranian government, but to let them rethink how to focus on economics rather than on political stability.

Whether the sanction is effective is uncertain. But just like the North Korean nuclear problem, there will also be an answer soon.

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