Growing up, if I had a dollar - no, If I had ten cents for every time I heard something along the lines of, "wow my parents would kill me if I did that," I would probably have enough to pay my out of state tuition right now. At this point I'm pretty used to people telling me that I got away with way too much as a kid, and there's not doubt they're right.

I was always the one who hosted the sleep overs because I was allowed to have boys and girls sleep over and we could stay up or stay out for as long as we wanted. I got my first boyfriend when I was about fourteen and we had sleepovers. I got my first tattoo when I was sixteen. It took my mom about a month to notice - and no, she wasn't mad.

I can't tell you how many times other parents have made passive aggressive, or sometimes just straight up aggressive comments about the way my mom was raising me. There's a fairly long list of people who were banned from my house by their parents because we weren't "properly supervised" when we were over. One time I was even asked to leave a pool party because the mothers felt that a bikini I had picked out for myself was inappropriate for a girl my age and they didn't like the fact that my mother "allowed me out of the house like that " (Since you know, a bikini can single handily ruin a party)

but here's the thing....

My mom was my person

I used to want to spend time with her, talk about my day - get her insight on my shit show of a life. I don't know that feeling of oh crap my mom's gonna kill me I just knew that I can tell her anything because she's my mom and she loves me. I've never been grounded, had my phone taken away, had a curfew, been banned from the computer, been told what to wear, or been yelled at for getting in trouble at school. I used to look around and see my friends who had to make up these elaborate lies about where they've been and to this day I'm grateful I never had to be a sneaky kid.

and here's the other thing..

I turned out just fine. Despite how it might sound to those who grew up with strict parents - my mom was NOT a bad mother. She just had the mentality that there was always worse things that could happen in the world. Why spend your time getting mad over little things when you could spend your time enjoying each other's company?

I currently work two jobs to pay for my off campus house while being enrolled in a great school. I have never been arrested, had a kid, sat around shooting up drugs all day long, or even been fired from a job. I didn't get into bar fights, terrorize the neighborhood, fail out of school, and stay out all hours of the night.

So no, taking the train into queens by myself at thirteen didn't ruin me or get me kidnapped - it helped me become street smart, my mom was a phone call away if I really needed help - but I never did. And no, riding my bike to the 711 down the street at four in the morning when I wanted a slushy did not mean I was a wild kid - it meant when I want a slushy at four in the morning I got one. My mom knew I drank underage, she knew about the first time I smoked a cigarette - I told her I didn't see the big deal and how they were so addicting, we even talked about boys and sex openly. She wasn't mad when I told her we were hooking up - she just wanted me to be safe.

Just because my mom wasn't strict it does not mean I can't or didn't grow up to be successful. And I did not grow up to be a bad or wild kid. I just grew up with a different outlook on life and a hell of a lot more world experience than a lot of people I know.