Growing up, I was one of the lucky ones. In a day and age where divorce is a common family issue, I am the girl that has two parents who not only love me, but each other. They love each other so deeply and truly that the lessons they taught me went far beyond how to walk and talk. The love my parents share with each other and myself is something you read about in a Nicholas Spark's love story; it isn't perfect, but it is authentic and true to themselves.

My parents provide me with a beautiful house to live in, delicious meals to eat (when I'm home from school), and endless support in everything I do. They are my biggest fans, both having jobs that allow them to be at all of my sporting events, and it shows me how proud of me they really are. They provide me with much more than just an example to live by--they provide years and years of knowledge, stories, and experience. Every time I was sick at 3 a.m., they were right by my side rubbing my back or bringing me what I asked for. My parents always were, and still are, there for me every time I need them, and even when I don't need them, they are cheering me on. They raised me as a young woman who is ambitious and hard-working, somebody who stands up for herself, her beliefs, and her dreams. They raised me as a strong-willed, thick-skulled, confident female. That's what scares me.

I'm not afraid of myself or what I am capable of; I am afraid of the things I may not be capable of. Growing up, my parents always made sure I had the best of the best and gave me a wonderful lifestyle. That makes me wonder, what is going to happen when it comes time for me to have children? I know my parents have provided me with the skills to become a decent parent, but what if that isn't enough for the circumstances? What if I can't provide for my child the way my parents provide for me? I know this is still years, even decades away, but these are still the thoughts that cross my mind. I, by no means, am afraid of the future, I am just afraid of not being able to provide a future for my children that's as good as the one my parents provided for me

I always joke with my friends that I am never getting married, and I'll simply just have pets in my life, but what happens when that day rolls around where I do fall for somebody and want to spend the rest of my life with them, and have children, and a house, and pets, and a big family? What happens then? What if I fall in love with somebody who makes pennies, and we can't provide our children with everything they would want? What happens if my job ends up taking over my life, and I cannot be there for my family the way my parents were there for me? What happens if I am not the mother I want to be? Worst of all, what if I let my children down?

My parents would drop anything in a second for me, but what if I can't do that in the future for my children? What if my child is troubled in the worst ways? What if my child is bullied? What if my child doesn't love themselves the way I show them to? It's the "what if's" that scare me, and I know life isn't about those, but that doesn't mean they will be dismissed from my mind. I'm afraid of not being the mother that my mother was for me and marrying a man that would never be a father like my father was for me. I am afraid of having kids because I am afraid of becoming a parent. After having parents that set the bar unbelievably high, I hope that some day I can follow in their foot steps, maybe then I won't be so afraid. To my parents, thank you for showing me how a family should be run, how a parent should be a parent, and how to raise a free-spirited child. I love you more than anything.