We, as young adults, hear it more often than anyone else. Whenever we see an old friend, whenever we visit relatives, even our parents tell us that we have changed. There comes a time, though, when enough is enough.
“You’ve changed” has become a term in our society that has brought us to fall back more than push forward. Why? Because people nowadays use it to hurt other people.
Maybe you see an old friend and they rudely tell you how you've changed. Maybe because you grew up, and don’t play games anymore, your peers will tell you how you’ve changed. Let me be the one to tell you that changing is OK. Our world has been built off change. We evolve, revolutionize from change. How do we have cars and big glass buildings? Because we changed. How has our style of clothing transformed? Because we changed. How can I do things now that I once wasn’t able to? Because I changed, and so did you. We all change. It’s just a way of life.
The people we surround ourselves by need to understand that we are all human. We won’t be the same exact person next year that we are now. Maybe something traumatizing will occur in our lives that cause us to live or act differently. It happens more often than you and I know. In order to cope with our ways of life, we must change. I recently began to work almost 14 hours a day and it seems that far too many of my friends get upset with me for it. They tell me I don’t make time for them, that I have “changed”. Of course I have changed. College is in a couple months, I say. I need to have a way to pay for it.
The world is not handed to people like me, people like myself have to work for the things they own and want. We have to work for the lives we want to live. So to those who tell me that I’ve changed as if it’s a bad thing, I hope you know I’m glad that I did. I’m doing what’s best for me, and for those who can’t accept that, then maybe it’s time you find someone that isn’t willing to better their lives. Someone who will devote their same old lifestyle to you in order to keep you content, as if you won’t change over time either.
To those who get upset at people for changing, I feel sorry for you. You aren’t understanding of the bettering of my life, and you don’t understand why in order to grow up and be an adult as we age, we have to change some of the things we do. The way we spend our time will change. The way we look will change. If you tell me you liked my hair better when it was blonde or red or black than how it is brown, then I’m sorry that I’m not sorry. I love who I am now, and I have become someone that I can depend on. Only true friends will understand why it’s okay to change.
And yes, maybe even for us who change, it’s hard to watch those around us change. Maybe it makes us sad because we used to spend so much time doing something we once loved, or maybe we miss spending time with old friends. I hate to break it to you, but if you haven’t already realized it, that’s just how life works. Nothing will be the same a year from now. Your shoes will wear out, you may lose your closest friends, and your favorite fashion trends will soon go out of style.
But it’s okay.
New things will replace the old, and we cannot dwell on lost memories and past adventures. We can not depend on those things to stick around forever because they will change just like us. Our peers will change just like us. My best friend has changed, and sometimes I miss our old memories, but I look forward to the new ones we will have together. So rather than being upset about what once was, or who you once were, embrace what is now and what is to come.
As our hair grows longer and we wear away slowly, I hope we can find it in our hearts to continue to love the same. That’s one thing, the only thing really that is capable of remaining the same. Being able to love each other and being able to accept each other for our changes and for our new ways of life is a big part of growing up. For those of you having a rough time accepting your new lifestyle, just know that in a year it will be old news. Be happy that things change, that people change, because it gives us a chance to grow, experience, and love more. If our generation would not have evolved with the times, we would be missing out on so much. Though it is hard to see it, there is always good that stems from even the worst situations. For example, I didn’t want to move, but had I not moved, I would not have gotten a scholarship to my dream college. We forget the positive things so often that we don’t even recognize or appreciate them because we are too busy looking at the negative side of everything. Be open to change, respect change, let your peers change, and you will change even if you swear you won’t. It’s impossible not to.
In this situation, it’s okay to hop on the bandwagon with everyone else. I normally wouldn’t recommend following the leader, but in this case, it’s the only way we will grow as a community, and make better lives for ourselves and generations to come.
