When I was little I would beg my mother for a sibling. When I reached the age of 10, I was accustomed to being an only child, and that is when my first sister was born, her name is Anissa.
She is about to be 10 years old this year, and I now have two other siblings added on to that. In total, I have two little sisters, and a little brother. I am 17 years apart from the youngest, my little brother Joseph, and around 16 years apart from my youngest little sister, Janicia.
When you are this far apart from your siblings in age, it becomes difficult to form that regular sibling bond, where you fight and argue over everything, because I’m now at college. So while I still have a bond with them, it really isn’t your average kicking and screaming, because of the age difference they tend to respect me a lot more.
My sister Anissa is the one I have the average older-sister-little sibling-you’re-annoying-stop-it-relationship with, but even that plays out differently. She calls me and asks me what I’m doing and when I’m going to visit her, instead having the ability to follow me around the house and tag-a-long with me and my friends. One, because I’m so far away from home much of the year, and two because I’m so much older than she is, and I believe this frustrates her.
I think it’s a blessing to have siblings. I wouldn’t ever want to be the youngest, but I enjoy being the first, and hopefully I’ll have the chance to make a good example for them. The dynamic is different, but even though I’m not around much they still know who am I, and they still trust me.
I believe that the reason why they are immediately trusting with me even after not seeing me for a while, is because I was around when they were babies, and I did bond with them as infants.
The experience of watching them grow up, and form their own little personalities even weeks after being born, is beautiful. It is similar to watching a caterpillar form into a chrysalis and then emerge as a butterfly. My little sister Anissa is in a chrysalis form. She is on her way to middle school in only a few years, puberty is hitting her like a bus. My other little siblings are still tiny caterpillars, and I love having the ability to watch them evolve.
Joseph is very strong and silent, and he’s a momma’s boy. Janicia is funny, rambunctious, and she has a little attitude, she is a firecracker. Anissa is very intelligent, mischievous, super curious, and so talented at anything she puts her mind to.
All put together they are a wacky bunch of kids, that could probably drive anyone crazy, but they are so worth it. Every single thing about them, positive or a little negative. Every single day is a learning experience of epic proportions. When you reach adulthood there really isn’t that much more to know, usually it’s smaller things that come out of the cracks, or getting a career started, marriage, having kids of your own, graduating etc. As children, even a little bug or a flower, causes excitement, and in that way I feel because of that I have learned to also take pleasure in the very small things in life. Sometimes keeping that childlike wonderment allows you to escape this mentality of boredom, and never having anything to do or learn. For me, any learning experience is one that should be appreciated the good or the bad, and I hope that although me and my siblings are so far apart in age, that they know I am willing to help them though all the complications that come with growing and being a teenager. When they need their big sister, she will always be there.
Sometimes it can be struggle not being visibly near them, and it causes me to feel like a bad big sister, but I know deep down that they know I love them more than anything. That I’m just a phone call away, and that no matter what, their big sister would help them achieve anything their little heart’s desire.
I wrote this for all the older siblings who feel like they are too far apart from their younger siblings, or feel like they don’t get to spend enough time with them. They love you, and they know that you love them, just remember to always try and be present in whatever way possible. By doing that although you can’t be there for everything, at least they know you tried, and that you’re always there for them.
