Halloween is a popular holiday in the United States, where one dresses up in their fanciest or sexiest or most culturally-relevant costumes, and then goes out to party or to leech onto a bunch of candy. Children go out on the streets with their parents, and sometimes older siblings as well. Decorations ranging from spider webs to carved pumpkins hang on buildings and leftover candy scatters the streets.

From when I was young, I was enamored by the holiday. I would frequently dress up as a princess or a fairy for elementary school, and then we’d share candy and do fun activities in elementary school. Since then, I didn’t do much for Halloween but occasionally accompanied my sister while she trick-or-treated and indulged in candy. In high school, the science and language departments would clash with different costume themes, hoping to be the one on top.

This year, I was with Unite UW, in which we dressed up in costumes featuring different themes and carved pumpkins. It was all in good fun as we saw each other’s costumes and we obtained a bunch of Skittles and bubble gum.

Unfortunately, there weren’t any sour Skittles, unlike what’s promoted in the bag. But a startling revelation came about as I got home—I wasn’t having fun with Halloween anymore.

Personally, I’m not a party person, so I never went to any Halloween parties and don’t have any interest in them. I assume it is the same thing it was for every other party every other year, albeit with the spookiness which materializes every year, from frozen “hands” in punch to dancing to Thriller.

For the smaller ones, I imagine watching horror films and telling scary stories while indulging in candy.

Speaking of which, I’m now at the age where I shifted from “trick-or-treating,” which isn’t something I did much as a child, to being the one where I had to hand out candy.

On the one hand, I enjoy seeing the children and giving candy out, with their costumes so nice.

On the other hand, I envy them, and my younger sister, for being able to get free candy for one night, and then exchanging them with their friends.

As for free candy, that’s the one thing I enjoy about Halloween, though with a bit of pain in the process. At the Café on the Ave, they had a jar of saltwater taffies, and I took a handful. Other than the spicy cinnamon and the orange creamsicle flavored ones, flavors which I don’t enjoy on a day-to-day basis, I liked them so much I had another two handfuls of them.

Also, my sister got a green tea Kit Kat and gave it to me for a dollar. While it hurts the teeth, it’s a good beginning towards the food-coma-inducing holidays ahead.

I’ve learned that Halloween was originally a festival marking the end of the harvest, where the nights get longer and the material and spiritual worlds could almost meet. The story intrigues me, especially how for years I wasn’t sure how Halloween formed or why it was celebrated.

That darkness aside, despite the tinge with sugary candies, I would rather fast forward towards the holiday season, with more exams and papers, but with a lot more joy.