For the past few weeks, DJ Khaled has been captivating the world with his Snapchat stories. If you’ve added djkhaled305 on Snapchat, then you’re familiar with his enthralling life, which involves such things as watering his plants and jet-skiing. What most of the internet loves about his Snapchat is the constant motivation and inspiration he provides, along with his willingness to share the “keys to success” with the world.

DJ Khaled’s Snapchat stories are definitely inspiring, and I love the positive blessings he sends out to his followers, but let’s get real: I am slightly unnerved. How self-aware is DJ Khaled? When he says that the key to success is to get a manicure and pedicure every week, or to eat gluten-free, or to not drive your jet-ski in the dark, does he realize how ridiculous he sounds? Perhaps he is just trying to make us laugh as well as inspire us, but sometimes his wisdom is so surreal I have a hard time comprehending it.

Another one (oh my god) of Khaled’s famous phrases begins with “they don’t want you to…”. Whether it’s eat breakfast, eat lunch, jet-ski, drive a rolls royce or anything else, apparently they don’t want you to do it. But who is “they”? My first thought is that “they” refers to the elite of the world, the capitalist bourgeois. But if that were the case, we have to keep in mind that DJ Khaled himself is most definitely part of that capitalist ruling class. Could it be that he is trying to keep the spark of hope alive among us, the lower classes, in order to prevent revolution? Probably, yes.

DJ Khaled generously shares with us the keys to success, but has he actually found success himself? To me, his life seems repetitive. He has eggs whites and turkey sausage for breakfast, waters his plants, eats lunch, goes jet-skiing, hangs out with a famous friend and then returns home to his hot tub. His routine existence reminds me of this Squidward GIF:

Although I would love to be as wealthy as DJ Khaled, I wouldn’t want my only friends to be my personal chef and the guy who films me putting on deodorant. And what’s with his wife, who is featured in some of his snapchat videos but whose face is never shown? It seems like she feels their relationship is falling apart due to Khaled’s Snapchat addiction.

Before I conclude, don’t get me wrong: I still enjoy DJ Khaled’s Snapchat. I don’t watch it religiously, but it can be great sometimes and has certainly left me inspired and thankful for life in the past. But other times, I’m left feeling emptier than before I watched it, filled with only concern and confusion, but perhaps that’s all part of the journey of more success.