Bid day. One of the most exciting days for a lot of women in college. I am in a sorority and going into the recruitment process, I was so excited for bid day. I had heard girls say things like, “It’s like Christmas morning!,” and, “It will be one of the best days of your life.” However, for me, it was an extremely stressful and emotionally draining day. The night before, I had the hard choice of deciding between a chapter which I had a legacy to, or a different one with no familial ties. In the end, I picked the one that I felt was the right fit for me and it happened to be the one without a legacy. Immediately after I made the decision I thought I had made a mistake. I went back to my dorm and I cried. I talked with my roommate who graciously told me it will work out how it’s meant to. I tried my best to believe that, but in my heart I had no clue.

I woke up the next morning and I cried. I went to bid day and found out the news that I did in fact get a bid from the chapter I marked as my first choice. I tried my best to act excited, but I really just felt like crying (I’m a super emotional person in case that’s not obvious yet). I knew I could drop, but I had looked forward to joining Greek life and wanted it to be a positive experience. My sister was an active member of Greek life at her university and I wanted to experience the same fulfillment she got from it. The whole week of recruitment was a blur to me. The only prior desire I had about which chapter I would want to join was that of being a legacy. I still went into recruitment week very open minded. I had no clue how hard the week was gonna be. Each chapter I visited was full of amazing and sweet girls. I loved getting to meet new girls all week, but it did not make my decision easy. Each night I would sit and struggle with how I was going to narrow it down and make a rash decision when I no longer had time to think about it anymore.

My amazing recruitment counselors (shoutout to LoBro and Sam!) did all that they could to help me with my decision, but of course remained completely unbiased. Their support meant the world to me and continuously reminded me there was no wrong choice. While I agreed that there was no wrong choice, it made me doubt if I would fit into any of the chapters. I heard girls talk all week about how clear it was which chapter was for them, how they knew it since the first night of recruitment, and how they couldn’t wait to “run home.” Come bid day I looked back on the week and had no clue how I even made my decision each day. I guess it was my gut, but it was also probably a little luck that I ended up where I ended up.

Bid day was, you guessed it, a blur. I knew some of the girls in my new pledge class, but none super well. I felt it was promising that there were a decent amount of familiar faces in the crowd, but I really had no clue if I would fit in. The girls I talked to that day were all gorgeous and kind and sweet and funny. My instant reaction was to fall back onto my old insecure self from high school and tear myself down. I used that day as a way to see how I could never measure up to my 166 new sisters. I have dealt with my fair share of mean girls, and with sororities having the bad reputation of being catty I got scared. I instantly decided that I wasn't good enough to be in a sorority and that I would never fit in. My new sisters all seemed so accomplished and sure of themselves. The girls were confident and welcoming, but still I let myself fill my head with negative thoughts. The countless hugs and fun conversations I had all day long weren't enough to get me outside of my own head. No one but myself gave me any reason to not be happy on bid day. I'm my own worst enemy sometimes.

I went back to my dorm that day and I wasn’t sure what I was gonna do next. I didn’t understand what the chapter saw in me that made them give me a bid. Nonetheless, I made myself stick with it. I gave myself till the deadline of initiation to decide if Greek life would be for me or not. Looking back, I see how crazy I was to be so scared. Now I could not be happier with my choice to stay. It didn’t happen overnight. I forced myself to be as confident as I could and to go to as many events as I could. I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and that was just the first way my chapter has made me into my best self.

I met so many nice older girls, I met so many friendly girls in my pledge class, I got paired with my beautiful big, and eventually I found my place in the chapter. I can’t believe I was naive enough to think that I wouldn’t fit in with the amazing girls of Alpha Phi. It suddenly became so clear to me that I had found the chapter which was a perfect fit for me. I have found a place I can call home. My chapter has pushed me to believe in myself more now than ever before. My sisters have helped me to gain the confidence that I had struggled with having my entire life. I can honestly say the chapter has enhanced my experience at Marquette and my life in ways I would have never guessed. The friendships have helped me grow into someone who is sure of herself and is stronger than ever before. My chapter builds me up, and I can’t imagine my life without these girls and what they’ve done for me. I’ve made my closest friends at college, and they have been there for me through all my ups and downs. I have laughed harder with them and made some of my favorite memories of college with them. And I’ve only been a member since last January. While bid day was not a good experience for me, due to my own insecurities, I am so looking forward to the next three years of college with my sorority sisters by my side. So don’t worry if bid day isn’t the best day of your life, going through recruitment may still very well be one of the best decisions you’ve made in your life.