**DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT JUDGING ANYONE WHO USES DATING APPS, TO EACH IT'S OWN....THIS IS WHAT MY EXPERIENCE HAS BEEN LIKE AND MY OPINIONS.
I'm going to get really real for a little bit.
So a few years back, I created my Tinder account. I thought, why not right? All the cool kids have it, what could it hurt? Well, I was definitely not aware of how much a stupid app would impact my self-confidence and my life in general.
The concept of Tinder is an extroverted introvert's heaven, you get a chance to express yourself...without the awkwardness of seeing the person in front of your face. The downside for me was that Tinder is the haven for hookup culture. I knew this going into the app, with absolutely no intentions of using it for that purpose.
I am a lover. I am obsessed with the concept of love. Due to this, I find it hard to ever think about being with someone just to be with them for that one night. This made my Tinder life less than exciting, and many guys would get bored after a day or so.
What I was terrified to realize was that this fact didn't matter to me. I honestly just loved the attention that guys would give me, even if it was just for a second during their day. I realize now, that this created a dark and terrible path for my self-esteem. A GIRL'S WORTH SHOULD NEVER BE EQUATED TO A GUY'S NEEDS. This was where I was, generating my only worth from a boy miles away seeing 5 photos of me and telling me that I was the most beautiful girl in the world.
This seems like i'm being dramatic but I don't think anyone understands the dark side to these apps, what Tinder and Bumble could do to a girl with low self worth already. I became infatuated with talking to these people, these people who didn't even matter. When I was sad, i'd flip through Tinder to see if a cute guy would match with me or if someone would tell me I was worth something. It would make me feel better, enough to get by.
It wasn't until recently that I realized how disgusted I should be by my own actions. I am worth more that a swipe on an app, why would I ever this so low of myself? For me, these dating apps were dangerous, they were a way to find a false sense of affection. What started as something fun, became an addictive habit. It allowed strangers to tell me where my worth should be placed.
My advice is simple, DO NOT USE DATING APPS AS A SOLACE. No James Smith in the backwoods Iowa is worth that kind of time. If you are anything like me, these apps were not made with you in mind. As lame as it sounds, let love find you. You are a sensitive soul and the dating app world is not suited for where you are emotionally, and that is okay.