When looking around a street or classroom, it is expected that girls would have long flowing hair while boys would have short and neatly cut hair. This is no longer the case. Now, you can see boys with long shaggy hair or buzzed sides and a bun (or "man bun"), while many girls are now cutting their hair shorter and shorter. Where this trend originated, is unknown, but it's an empowering and, for some, spiritual change.
Cutting my hair was a spiritual change. High school was filled with crippling anxiety and serious depressive episodes. I quickly began to see physical and emotional changes happening to me. While I became more irritable and more isolated, I also lost a lot of weight and my thick hair quickly became paper thin. My hair then started falling out in clumps, and was becoming brittle. When I went to the doctor to see what was happening, they told me there was only one way to stop it-be less stressed.
This wasn't an option. I was always stressed. Homework stressed me out, my friends, my family, and finding out that my hair was falling out because I was stressed, stressed me out even more. I quickly looked for other options that would help my hair, and help my self-esteem. I looked at shampoos, pills, diets and everything else. Every option that came up consisted of strict schedules and diets which just stressed me out just as much. As I looked online, I saw more and more celebrities were cutting their hair short. Not shoulder length short, but pixie cut short. The more I looked these celebrities the more I knew I wanted that haircut.
After month and months of begging and pleading with my mother who couldn't imagine my long hair disappearing, I finally made the appointment. My best friend, Jackie, and I went to the salon with all of my pictures, ready to see my transformation.
The feeling of all my hair being cut off felt like a literal weight off my shoulders. I felt lighter and capable of anything. When my stylish finished, I looked in the mirror and cried. I hadn't felt that confident and strong in years. I still feel this way every morning when I wake up, no matter how bad my bed head is.
Many people ask me if I will ever grow my hair back out and every time I respond with a stern no. Photos with my long hair remind me of my unhealthy habits and unstable emotions. My short hair kick started my new attitude and gave me a more positive outlook in life.
I encourage any girl thinking of getting a pixie cut to follow their dreams and get it. Hair is not permanent. If you hate it, it'll grow back. Pixie cuts can be styled in so many different ways, or, if you're like me, you can just roll out of bed and your hair will be done. The act of cutting off your hair feels like the weight of the world just left your shoulders. Sometimes all you need is a change, and cutting your hair may be the change you need.
