As someone who lived with his grandparents for eight—yes, let me repeat, eight years—I have learned a thing or two about the folks from the Greatest Generation. While their personal beliefs may be different from those of my fellow Millennials, I have come to realize our living habits as college students are not far off from how those in retirement homes are living. Here are just some of the similarities between retirement homes and college.
Living next door to your friends. The best part about college is living among those that you care about, and being in a retirement home is just the same. Whenever you want, your friends are down the hall and ready to talk smack about Ethel who is hogging all of the good knitting yarn.
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Downing shots of mysterious liquid. In college, your friends are forcing Fireball down your throat, and in an old folks home it is your nurse that is making you take your new medicine that now comes in liquid form. The first initial taste is painful for both, but the end goal is worth the temporary pain.
Getting your freak on after all of these years. No one wants to think about his or her parents doing the deed, so they especially do not want to think about their grandparents doing it either. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but with all of the new people to meet in retirement communities, someone is bound to catch your newly single grandparent's eye and make them want to do the dance without pants.
Watching excessive amounts of TV. Everyone associates old people with sitting on a recliner, watching TV, but at least the elderly have the patience of waiting an entire twenty-four hours before their next soap comes on. College students, on the other hand, can easily binge watch an entire season on Netflix in one sitting.
Hating the man. R.A.s are a buzz kill in college and nurses are a buzz kill in retirement communities. Sometimes they can be nice and look the other way, but most of the time, these people will not leave you alone until they single-handedly ruin your life.
Eating gross food. Remember when you moved out of the dorms and swore to only eat real food once you moved out (and then ate Easy Mac three times a week the following semester)? Turns out the same indigestible food returns to your diet once again when you move into a retirement home, but hey, at least there is jello now.
Residing in a less-than-satisfactory bedroom. Your dorm is small, smelly, and occasionally lonely, and so is your bedroom in a retirement home. Your roommate in college is annoying because he brings his girlfriend over and your roommate in a retirement home is annoying because he will not stop coughing all night.
Sleeping whenever you want. People sleep in college because they are taking advantage of the fact that they can take naps in the middle of the day before getting a real job. People sleep in retirement homes because they are still tired from that real job they got after college.
Partying 'til you drop. You like going to bars. Grandpa likes going to bingo. Well, to each his own.
Among all of the similarities, the most important is the state of mind that is common among younger and older people, and that, my friends, is YOLO. Perhaps because most people from the Greatest Generation were forced to enter the workforce at a young age and, therefore, not able to experience the now common luxury of college, retirement homes have become a place for people from their generation to unwind and live as they never have before.
My advice is next time you have the chance to talk to those who live in retirement homes, do not wait for them to ask you how school is going. Take the initiative and ask them how their lives are going. You may be surprised to find you two are not so different after all.
