I come from a big family; I’m talking seven daughters, same parents, 25 year age range (yes, really, 25 years) and a whole lot of attitude. Throughout the years of my life, hearing everyone else’s opinions on big families kind of struck me as odd because the main argument against was that it was “too much.” And while there is plenty of an argument there if you dig for it, the argument for having a big family is because there is so much. Why is the biggest selling point also the main reason people don’t buy into big families? Well, perspective, mostly. If you’re looking at a family as an expense, then yes, a small family might ease your mind. But, if you’re looking for a support system, I’d recommend the big family package, complete with squishing inside a minivan to go to any family function together.

From personal experience and observation, having a family is costly. Any size has a definite lifetime price tag, but the more babies you add to that and the bigger the amount of money you will ultimately have to spend to keep all those humans alive and healthy. Common sense. So, a family is a lifetime investment of your time and money, and while most find having a family very appealing, not as many would agree on having one with quite so large of a price tag or commitment (remember, some families have 25 year age ranges). And that’s okay. The major thing here is that you have to make big decisions with your spouse, and those are between you two, not you two and Ned from Walmart. That said, no matter what, if you’ve made it this far, you know that everyone’s got an opinion on how you should live your life. So just do what you feel is right and let them keep their opinions. Families are actually a big deal, and having a big one is more expensive than a smaller one, and it will also take more of your time and energy. These are just simple facts of life.

However, all of this said, growing up with a big family has been one of the foremost sources of strength and support in my personal experience. Both of my parents come from fairly large-sized families (five on both sides, meaning I have ten aunts and uncles that I’m related to by blood) and both are the eldest child in their family birth order. I’m not 100% sure if they went into it wanting as big of a family as they ended up with, but they definitely love it. It’s good to have exposure to different personalities, opinions, ideas and even beliefs all coming from the same background. It has helped me to gain perspective that even if we were raised by the same people, I am not the same kind of person as any one of my sisters, though we all have fundamental similarities that will always connect us to one another. Big families are loud, opinionated and ready for an argument if you say anything against Meg Ryan or Julia Roberts, but they will always have your back. As a woman, knowing that I have four other women with the same medical background as me to turn to is a comfort, if I struggle with a mental illness I have multiple people I can turn to for support, and If I hit rough times and money is tight, I know they’ll help me find a way to get back on my feet. Having a big family is an expensive startup, but once everyone’s grown and doing their own thing, you start to see the advantages of having six other people who are bound to you by blood that you can annoy for your entire life. It’s great.

If you’re about having a career and focusing your life on your work, I salute you with a hearty “good luck” if you also want a big family, because that in and of itself is a lengthy career that many have devoted their lives to. Whatever you decide, just make sure that you never run out of toilet paper.