Question: When was the last time you saw a retail employee in a wheelchair? Currently, approximately 38.3 million people in the United States are considered severely disabled, which equates to approximately 12% of our population. According to the American Psychology Association, 56% of American's personally know someone with an intellectual disability. Despite how prevalent disability is in our society, it is one of the most overlooked groups whose needs are often not met. We’ve all seen movements to prevent and protect against discrimination based on race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, but it is rare that one finds a campaign advocating for the rights of the impaired. Our society unconsciously looks down upon those who are mentally or physically less adept, because they are seen as weaker or somehow less. Ironically, while the disabled are one of the least represented communities, they are a group that needs the most help in creating a voice and carving their rightful place among us.

The rights of the disabled are important to me because of someone I love deeply. I am the lucky twin. Sometimes our lives can pivot on a single moment: for my brother, that was conception. Due to an unfortunate roll of the genetic dice, he has a small deletion on his X chromosome. He and I may have been born together, but we are destined to have divergent futures. Of the billions of base pairs in my brother’s DNA, one dropped stitch corrupted every equation of his life and that alteration molded his fate. His neurological function is acutely compromised with a host of malevolent manifestations, including autism. This diagnosis sent our family on a frightening pilgrimage that we assumed would be an adventure in despair. Fortunately, it was not. While I have spent many hours caring for and assisting my brother, I have not been burdened by this task. Our relationship is reciprocal, and I have been rewarded with deep affection and gratitude from him. I have learned that kindness and patience contribute much to alleviating life’s difficulties. A neurotypical person cannot even begin to fathom the fortitude required for autistics to navigate ordinary experiences throughout the day, but I see how, even in the most stressful situations, hope and a sense of humor can pierce the wall that obscures the future.

Having a disabled family member has awakened me to society’s attitude towards those that are different. People are more likely to assist someone with a physical handicap because they elicit sympathy. However, those with a mental impairment often engender fear and even contempt. It is painful for me to experience the stares and the harsh words of others when they pass judgment on behavior they do not understand. I have never known life unaffected by disability, and even I cannot imagine some of the struggles that my brother—and others like him—go through every day. I strive to set aside prejudice, and I have learned to try to not judge others for characteristics that are beyond their control. As a community, we all need to work harder to include the disabled as fully participating and valued members of society.

My experience with the disabled has lead me to unearth one obscured truth: they are not so different from the rest of us. Of course, they might look and move differently, however ultimately we are all human, and that fact should draw us together. Rather than focusing on how the physically and mentally impaired are different from us, we should focus on our points of similarity. My twin brother may act and think uniquely, but that does not change the fact that we share a birthday, genes, parents, siblings and a home. Our differences don’t disconnect our love for each other as brother and sister. He is as entitled as the rest of us to feel, vote, fall in love and experience the dignity of his labor and self-determination as much as possible.

As a society, we have to make a priority of inclusion and tolerance. Employers should be incentivized to train and provide jobs to the less abled. Programs should be put in place to match the often-minimal needs of a disabled person with someone who could use a part time job helping out. We have thousands of wounded young men and women returning from wars who do not deserve to be discarded from society so readily. With retraining and flexibility, these citizens can rebuild their lives and feel valued for their contributions. I ask again, when was the last time you saw a retail employee in a wheelchair? Would it really bother you? Why should your need to feel comfortable take priority over someone else’s right to earn a living? Rather than alienate and isolate the less abled, we should embrace their presence in our social tapestry. If we include and surround ourselves with those who are less able, perhaps as a society we will become more open and less squeamish about difference in general. I remind you that one in four people who are currently in their twenties will become disabled to some degree before they retire. Disability is a possible reality for everyone.

The disabled are not different. The disabled are us.