Who I Follow
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

Who I Follow

I used to follow you, when I should have followed Him.

Who I Follow

Throughout our lives, so many different people, things and ideas try to take us over. As hard as we may try to resist, there are just some times where the pressure, temptation, fear, or even uncertainty bring us to places where we never wanted to go. These places change us, and usually require quite an effort in order bring ourselves back to the real “us."

As you read this, you’ll notice the word “you” quite a lot. This “you” could be anything – a person, a dream, an addiction, an illness, a state of being – depending on your own experience.

I used to follow you. I used to change myself in order to bring you closer to me. I used to count on you every day to bring me everything I needed.

I used to think you were what I needed.

I used to think I would never be without you. I used to think the lies you told me about myself were true. I used to believe every word you said, trust your every judgement and believe you had good intentions in your actually destructive, harmful actions.

I used to ignore the warning signs, the hurt you caused me and the uneasiness I felt when truthfully thinking about you.

I used to think you were always right and that I would never be, because that’s what you told me.

I used to follow “you": a person, or thing, or belief, whichever “you” may be at this moment. I based my definition of myself, my definition of love and my definition of happiness on “you."

One day, I stopped following you. For the first time in a long time, I was free.

But I didn’t know who I was because I had based so much of myself on you.

Then came the struggles, the tears, the highs and lows and all-over-the-places. I fought and pushed and hoped my way through until I saw the other side, a side much more fulfilling and appealing than where “you” once were.

I prayed, believed, cried and yelled until the idea of you was no longer what I hoped to return to. After a while, I realized I really needed to return to myself.

So, I did.

I started listening to myself. My dreams, fears, worries and joys were so much more expansive than what I ever allowed myself to realize when you were there.

The most important thing, however, was that I realized Who I actually needed to be following.

He who is greater than I, and greater than you, is the only one I need to be following.

For the first time in a long time, I allowed myself to truly pray. I spilled my heart to Christ, and He listened. I told Him my need, my struggle, my hurt, and He listened. He helped me.

He took the broken pieces of me and showed me that they weren’t really broken after all. They were simply in the dark.

He saw the light in me that you never allowed me to see.

And, that is (one of the many reasons) why I follow Him.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

college students waiting in a long line in the hallway

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments