Who I Follow
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

Who I Follow

I used to follow you, when I should have followed Him.

9
Who I Follow

Throughout our lives, so many different people, things and ideas try to take us over. As hard as we may try to resist, there are just some times where the pressure, temptation, fear, or even uncertainty bring us to places where we never wanted to go. These places change us, and usually require quite an effort in order bring ourselves back to the real “us."

As you read this, you’ll notice the word “you” quite a lot. This “you” could be anything – a person, a dream, an addiction, an illness, a state of being – depending on your own experience.

I used to follow you. I used to change myself in order to bring you closer to me. I used to count on you every day to bring me everything I needed.

I used to think you were what I needed.

I used to think I would never be without you. I used to think the lies you told me about myself were true. I used to believe every word you said, trust your every judgement and believe you had good intentions in your actually destructive, harmful actions.

I used to ignore the warning signs, the hurt you caused me and the uneasiness I felt when truthfully thinking about you.

I used to think you were always right and that I would never be, because that’s what you told me.

I used to follow “you": a person, or thing, or belief, whichever “you” may be at this moment. I based my definition of myself, my definition of love and my definition of happiness on “you."

One day, I stopped following you. For the first time in a long time, I was free.

But I didn’t know who I was because I had based so much of myself on you.

Then came the struggles, the tears, the highs and lows and all-over-the-places. I fought and pushed and hoped my way through until I saw the other side, a side much more fulfilling and appealing than where “you” once were.

I prayed, believed, cried and yelled until the idea of you was no longer what I hoped to return to. After a while, I realized I really needed to return to myself.

So, I did.

I started listening to myself. My dreams, fears, worries and joys were so much more expansive than what I ever allowed myself to realize when you were there.

The most important thing, however, was that I realized Who I actually needed to be following.

He who is greater than I, and greater than you, is the only one I need to be following.

For the first time in a long time, I allowed myself to truly pray. I spilled my heart to Christ, and He listened. I told Him my need, my struggle, my hurt, and He listened. He helped me.

He took the broken pieces of me and showed me that they weren’t really broken after all. They were simply in the dark.

He saw the light in me that you never allowed me to see.

And, that is (one of the many reasons) why I follow Him.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

150 Words For Anyone Who Loves Football Games

Why I love high school football games, even though I don't like football.

944
Dallas News

When most think of high school they think of friend drama, parties, getting your drivers license, and best of all foot ball games.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics

10 Greatest Speeches In Modern American History

The United States is a relatively infantile nation, but its legacy of spoken rhetoric is one of the richest in the world.

3575
flickr

Rhetoric, in all its forms, arrives under the scrutiny of historians both for its historical impact and literary value. Dozens of speeches have either rallied the nation together or driven it drastically apart –– the impact of speeches in politics, social movements, and wars is undeniable.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics

What If The U.N. Actually United The Nations?

This is me taking a break from being cynical and imagining how the world could be one day.

4369
Unsplash

By now, people are probably sick of hearing me talk about myself, so I’m changing it up this week. In keeping with the subject of my J-Term class, I’m asking myself a political what-if question. What if we could create a sovereign global government firmly grounded in justice that could actually adjudicate Earth’s many disparate nation-states into one unified world government?

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

100 Things I'd Rather Do Than Study

Procrastination Nation, unite.

4654
Panda Whale
Here are 100 things I'd rather to than study. I know the semester just started, but

    1. Watch a movie
    2. Take a nap
    3. Have a dance party
    4. Eat ice cream
    5. Bake a cake
    6. Cry just a little bit
    7. Knit a blanket
    8. Learn to ride a bike
    9. Build a crib
    10. Watch a hockey game
    11. Watch any game
    12. Play with my hair
    13. Dye my hair
    14. Go grocery shopping
    15. Learn to crochet
    16. Do 50 jumping jacks
    17. Drive cross country
    18. Take a bubble bath
    19. Squeeze lemons for lemonade
    20. Sell the lemonade
    21. Make heart-shaped ice cubes
    22. Moisturize my knees
    23. Paint my nails
    24. Find the cure for cancer
    25. Run a marathon
    26. Just kidding, run down the hall
    27. Squat my bodyweight
    28. Eat my bodyweight in French fries
    29. Hibernate until Christmas
    30. Cuddle my body pillow (unless you have a boo)
    31. Think about all the work I’m not doing
    32. Wash my bed sheets
    33. Vacuum my apartment
    34. Play mini golf
    35. Go swimming
    36. Tan in this Texas heat
    37. Sing like I’m about to win American Idol
    38. Blow up balloons
    39. Pop the balloons
    40. Make lists
    41. Write an Odyssey article
    42. Pet a puppy
    43. Adopt a puppy
    44. Pay my rent
    45. Order a pizza
    46. Start a garden
    47. Cook a turkey
    48. Find new music
    49. Clean my waffle iron
    50. Learn to make jam
    51. Jam to music
    52. Play scrabble
    53. Volunteer anywhere
    54. Celebrate a birthday
    55. Watch a makeup tutorial I’ll never use
    56. Go through old pictures on my phone
    57. Make a playlist
    58. Take a shower
    59. Clean my room
    60. Curl my hair
    61. Climb a rock wall
    62. Get a massage
    63. Play with Snapchat filters
    64. Roast a chicken
    65. Go fishing
    66. Chug some Snapple
    67. Ride in a cart around Walmart
    68. Count the days until the semester is over
    69. Overthink about my future
    70. Think of my future baby’s names
    71. Pin everything on Pinterest
    72. Text anybody
    73. Pray about life
    74. Watch a sunset
    75. Watch a sunrise
    76. Have a picnic
    77. Read a book (that’s not for school)
    78. Go to a bakery
    79. Snuggle a bunny
    80. Clean my apartment
    81. Wash my dishes
    82. Rearrange my furniture
    83. Physically run away from my problems
    84. Make some meatballs
    85. Learn to make bread
    86. Google myself
    87. Ride a Ferris wheel
    88. Get stuck on a Ferris wheel (that way, it’s not my fault I’m not studying)
    89. Wash my car
    90. Get on a plane to Neverland
    91. Find Narnia in my closet
    92. Jump on a trampoline
    93. Learn to ice skate
    94. Go rollerblading
    95. Ride a rollercoaster
    96. Carve a pumpkin
    97. Restore water in a third world country
    98. FaceTime my family
    99. Hug my mom
    100. Tell my friends I love them
    Featured

    The Basics Of The United Nations

    As the General Assembly convenes, here is the United Nations 101

    3288
    WikiMedia

    For an organization that literally unites the nations, it amazes me how little is taught about the United Nations in schools, or at least where I went to school. It wasn't until I went to college and got a higher education that I learned the basics of the United Nations. I believe that every American should know at least the basics of what the United Nations does, especially since our country is one of the 5 permanent members. So here are the main "organs" of the United Nations.

    Keep Reading... Show less

    Subscribe to Our Newsletter

    Facebook Comments