Lying. We all do it. Even if we change the terminology and say we were kidding or fibbing or just not giving the whole truth. We lie. When we are kids we lie about brushing our teeth and flossing, then we sit there with our mouth shut so our parents can't tell. We were so sneaky weren't we… Then as teens and young adults we start using the words "okay" and "fine" to indicate a vague response and everyone tends to go along with it because it sounds right. "How are your grades?" Fine. "How are you feeling?" Fine. "Are you okay?" I'm fine. "Make sure you are home at a decent hour." Okay. "Don't lie." Okay.
It is not fine. It is not okay.
Those words do not mean what they used to mean and that is the sad truth. That we live in a society where you cannot trust those closest to you with a single word response because their interpretation would conclude in that statement was a request- not a demand.
My point is that everyone lies, either intentionally or unintentionally, even over the smallest most pointless things. Parents lie about Santa to force their kids to be well behaved, teenagers lie to their parents because "they just won't understand", boyfriends lie to their girlfriends because they feel controlled. It is a cycle, and everyone has their excuse as to why it is necessary even in instances where it is not.
I have a younger sister and like any younger sibling, she likes to wear my clothes… without permission. Now to all the big sisters out there who have younger siblings, you understand where I am going with this, and to all the younger sisters who sneak into their older sister's rooms when we are at work, here is a helpful hint…. YOU ARE NOT SNEAKY! Back to the point, my sister loves to take things without permission and tends to lie to omit trouble in the future, which gets her into more trouble.
She will steal everything from T-Shirts to swimsuits, to dresses, and when I am getting ready in the morning and cannot find my clothes, you can bet there is some tension in our house. I always ask myself why she lies when I know she has it. I could literally be staring at my shirt laying on her chair and she will claim "I didn't put it there" or "Oh I didn't know it was yours". It has gotten to the point where I have to ransack her room, look through dirty laundry, unzip every backpack she owns, just to find things ripped and stained and torn after she "borrowed them". I used to do what any sane person would do and yell at her, tell my parents, stalk her Instagram to watch when she posts something in my clothes. I would even ask my friends who were in the same classes as her to report back to me with what she was wearing throughout the day, so I knew when she took my things. It was insane.
Now you may be reading this and questioning my sanity as to why I would go through the trouble to report my sister stealing some fabric from my closet to thousands of people, well this is a small example from a much much bigger issue. Currently, in politics, Brett Kavanaugh is being accused of sexual assault from 30 years prior to the date. Now I am not taking the side of Kavanaugh or of the women accusing him, but one side is lying. Either he is being wrongfully accused at a very convenient time and these women are about to ruin his entire career and possibly force him to serve jail time over a crime he did not commit; or he is lying and he mentally and physically harmed these women and therefore should not be able to serve as a public figure. Do you see how screwed up a situation can get? It has escalated to the point where the lying party will lose their face in public. As I said, I do not know what really happened and I am not taking sides, but come on. We are teaching kids that lying is bad and instead of being an example, it is plastered on every news, media, and public outlet. I can't walk into Target without hearing a conversation or seeing it pop up on my phone. It is all because one side told a lie and it makes me sick.
So it is time to stop.
Yes it is easier said than done, but it is possible. There are always consequences to your actions and the sad thing is that many of these kids and adults get away with everything and will end up at a point where its not a slap on the wrist, it's a cold jail cell and a notification that you are shunned in public. It is a felony charge on your record for something as small as lying and having drugs in the back seat of your vehicle. It is stupid childish acts which get people in the most trouble because they won't take responsibility for their actions. And once you stop caring, you cannot think like a logical person, you cannot act like a real adult, and you cannot see into a bright and successful future.
We have to learn to care about each other, but more importantly ourselves. Trust is very easy to lose but is one of the hardest things you can gain. Don't break someone's trust, because you never know how fast those severed ties can come back to bite.