America is a melting pot that is constantly evolving and thriving on new ideas and experiences. The opinions of others are what inspires us to think more deeply into our own views and grow as people. Your opinions and experiences are so important to form, develop, and share...except when they aren't.
There are times in our lives when it doesn't matter what we think. What matters is how we act to build up others.
When a child, be it yours, your brother's, or your neighbor's, comes out as homosexual or transgender, your opinion on their "lifestyle" is the furthest thing from relevant. What is relevant is how you treat that child and how you choose to support them. What is important is that a child feels unconditional love and that they feel happy and safe. There is a difference between concern and judgement, and it is vital to some children's survival that you learn that difference. Rejection and invalidation are literally killing LGBT youth and feeding into depression and addiction.
When someone's place of worship is vandalized, it does not matter that their beliefs and practices are different from your own. What matters is that you recognize others' right to worship freely and safely and that yourself and your community work to support and protect that right.
When someone you know is assaulted, your opinion on their dress or behavior isn't necessary. They will already be dissecting their own actions and blaming themselves for years. What is necessary of you as a human is that you show unwavering support and empathy, rather than taking it upon yourself to put her on trial and further trample her spirit.
When a crime or tragedy befalls a family of immigrants, it is not the time to share that you had said all along that people should go back where they came from in the first place. It is time to assess your own humanity and realize that a family would not uproot their lives if they weren't seeking a better one for their children, and that illegal or not, no one deserves to feel unsafe in their own homes.
When an unarmed teen is threatened or shot, there is no need for bringing up that one time when a teen was shot and it was found to be justified. There is no need to dissect his race and culture and compare him to those rowdy "thugs" that live down the street from you. There is a need for recognizing the cruelty in the world in that moment and mourning the loss of innocent lives and the impact that it has on your family, community, and country.
Opinions are wonderful. They give our lives variety and inspire us to explore other points of views and creative resolutions. However, there is a time and a place. When your opinion would only serve to satisfy your own need to speak, rather than building up others in their time of need, you're not exercising your freedom of religion or speech, you're being a bully.
