When You Fall For The Girl Who Is Afraid To Be Vulnerable

When You Fall For The Girl Who Is Afraid To Be Vulnerable

Even if our heart whispers "yes," that risk is terrifying.
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You've found yourself falling for a girl that makes you happy, who makes you laugh and you can't possibly find anything about her that is a flaw - if anything, her imperfections are what make her so likable. You have the best conversations that usually go on for hours - from passions, all the way back to your favorite movie in the world. You can practically talk about anything, and you make each other laugh. However, this girl is wrapped up in her own fears. She's good at hiding it, but you can tell that beneath the surface, she is terrified of letting anyone else close to her in a way that would make you the happiest alive. You've heard it in her voice when she's talked about her past. She won't admit it, but she is afraid to be vulnerable, to take those chances even though she very much wants to. Letting someone back in terrifies her. But you can try to understand:

First of all, please be patient.

You can't just expect her to snap out of something that has meant a lot to her. If you truly care about her, you will understand that some things take time, and she is taking time to understand herself, as she so desperately wants to take that leap of faith. Sometimes, people's emotions aren't just black and white, or logical. They can be an array of different colors, all blending into one another. It's beautiful, but it can get messy. She feels like she is wasting your time and that makes her feel terrible.

She has gone through things.


Even if it doesn't seem like a big deal to you, it's a big deal to her and going through this isn't easy. Her past is doing a good job coming back to haunt her present, and is trying to determine her future - even though, that is ultimately all in her power. However, it's simple to run away from things that were once familiar and comfortable, because people can be so easily afraid of getting hurt again. She's afraid of getting hurt again, so hiding is the safest route.

New love brings back old pain.

Those new feelings that she has towards you, are both exciting and terrifying. Feeling things for someone else is a reminder of what she used to feel with the person that broke her heart and basically destroyed her outlook on love and relationships.

Love isn't always equal.

Even though two people can love each other so much, there is always that part where someone is going to be the one who loves more - that person who puts in just a little bit extra than the other, the one who fights the most. Chances are, this girl was the one who fought a little bit harder than her ex significant other. She's afraid to put her heart on her sleeve because she's so used to trying harder and getting let down - and she's sick of it. She wants someone to also fight for her just as much.

She doesn't want to be like this forever

Believe it or not, she doesn't want to run away from falling in love. She feels trapped inside of herself, afraid she will end up alone just because her current feelings stemmed from her past cling so tightly to her, and are so strong. She so badly wants to shed those feelings of fear so she can move on with her life. She wants to fall in love. She is a romantic. She doesn't want to be this way, and she hates it.

I know that she shouldn't let this rule her, and she can't keep depending on the past as an excuse . . . but that's the thing - it's not an excuse, it's her reality. Shedding the past in order to become vulnerable again, isn't easy for some people who have been hurt multiple times. Other people can do it better, some, not so much. But that doesn't mean that they are not capable or are broken. Some of the most cooped up people who stash their hearts away, are some of the most romantic, and that's what is heart-breaking. Listen to her.

Cover Image Credit: favim

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What Your Hogwarts House Says About You

Get yourself sorted and find out where you belong in the world of witchcraft and wizardry.
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Sorting at Hogwarts is a big deal. Being sorted into a house is essentially being placed into a family while you are away from home learning about witchcraft and wizardry. Your house is made up of the people you will live with, go to classes with, play Quidditch with and everything in between. You basically spend 24/7 with them. Your Hogwarts house is your home away from home.

When you get sorted into a house, it is based on your personality traits. The people in your house are typically like-minded people who display the same characteristics as you.

When you’re a first year at Hogwarts, the minute you set foot in the castle you are swept into the Great Hall to have the ancient Sorting Hat placed on your head. This Sorting Hat decides which “family” you’ll be spending your seven years with.

For some, it is very obvious which house they will be in, due to certain personality traits they possess. For others, they may exemplify traits that fit a multitude of houses and are uncertain where they may end up.

To find out where you belong, you can take the official "Harry Potter" Sorting Hat quiz at Pottermore.com. For all you muggles out there, these are the characteristics that the houses possess and what your house says about you:

Gryffindor: The house of the brave, loyal, courageous, adventurous, daring and chivalrous. Those who stand up for others are typically Gryffindors. Brave-hearted is the most well-known Gryffindor characteristic, and Gryffindors are also known for having a lot of nerve.

Gryffindors are people who hold a multitude of qualities alongside the ones listed, making them a very well-rounded house. People who are Gryffindors are often people who could fit nicely into another house but choose to tell the sorting hat they want Gryffindor (there's that bravery). "Do what is right" is the motto Gryffindors go by.

Being a Gryffindor means that you're probably the adventurous and courageous friend, and you are usually known for doing what is right.

Ravenclaw: The house is known for their wisdom, intelligence, creativity, cleverness and knowledge. Those who value brains over brawn can be found here. Ravenclaws often tend to be quite quirky as well. "Do what is wise" is the motto they strive to follow.

Though Ravenclaws can be know-it-alls sometimes, they most likely do know what the wisest decision is.

If you are known for being the quirky friend, the smartest in the group or just great at making wise decisions, you're definitely a Ravenclaw.

Hufflepuff: This house values hard work, dedication, fair play, patience, and loyalty. Hufflepuff’s are known for being just and true. "Do what is nice" is their motto.

Hufflepuff is known as the “nice house” and believes strongly in sparing peoples feelings and being kind. This is not to say that Hufflepuffs aren't smart or courageous. Hufflepuffs just enjoy making others happy and tend to be more patient towards people.

If you ever find that you are too nice for your own good and cannot bear to hurt someone’s feelings, congratulations, you are a Hufflepuff.

Slytherin: This is the house of the cunning, prideful, resourceful, ambitious, intelligent, and determined. Slytherin's love to be in charge and crave leadership. "Do what is necessary" is the motto of this house.

Slytherin is a fairly well-rounded house, similar to the other houses. They are loyal to those that are loyal to them just as Gryffindors are and are intelligent as Ravenclaws.

Slytherin house as a whole is not evil, despite how many dark wizards come out of this house. That is merely based on the choices of those wizards (so if your friend is a Slytherin, don’t judge, it doesn’t mean they are mean people). Slytherins do, however, have a tendency to be arrogant or prideful. This is most likely due to the fact that everyone in Slytherin is exceedingly proud to be there.

What Hogwarts house you’re in says a lot about the person you are, the traits you possess and how you may act in some situations. But in the end, your house is really just your home that is always there for you. Always.


Cover Image Credit: Warner Bros Pictures

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Poetry On Odyssey: I was I am

A poem for those struggling with who they were.

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it seems almost like a page

in someone else's book now


how there was

a time that i thought

i could have been happy

with someone like you


a million years before

i knew who i was

and that i should mean so much more

than i ever did to you


i almost can't remember

the way you held your elbows or

the way you said the letter o or

the way you told me goodnight


it seems now

that all i can recall

are my relentless tears and

the fear that this was the love

that everyone spoke about


the fear that this

was what id have to live with

for the rest of my life


i remember those late nights

just you and i

you always got what you wanted

i was always too afraid to upset you

looking back i wonder why

i couldnt leave you then


but you kept me

my misery maintained until

i felt like nothing


that night was the record scratch

When I knew my life

Shouldn't be like this.


It wasn't until I finally broke our ties

That I started to remember

Who I am.

But my mind is clear now.

I can remember

How strong I am,

How perfectly happy I am

On my own.


It seems almost like a page

In someone else's book now.


You're finally fading away.

I just wish my scars could fade as quickly.

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