When You Fall For The Girl Who Is Afraid To Be Vulnerable

When You Fall For The Girl Who Is Afraid To Be Vulnerable

Even if our heart whispers "yes," that risk is terrifying.

You've found yourself falling for a girl that makes you happy, who makes you laugh and you can't possibly find anything about her that is a flaw - if anything, her imperfections are what make her so likable. You have the best conversations that usually go on for hours - from passions, all the way back to your favorite movie in the world. You can practically talk about anything, and you make each other laugh. However, this girl is wrapped up in her own fears. She's good at hiding it, but you can tell that beneath the surface, she is terrified of letting anyone else close to her in a way that would make you the happiest alive. You've heard it in her voice when she's talked about her past. She won't admit it, but she is afraid to be vulnerable, to take those chances even though she very much wants to. Letting someone back in terrifies her. But you can try to understand:

First of all, please be patient.

You can't just expect her to snap out of something that has meant a lot to her. If you truly care about her, you will understand that some things take time, and she is taking time to understand herself, as she so desperately wants to take that leap of faith. Sometimes, people's emotions aren't just black and white, or logical. They can be an array of different colors, all blending into one another. It's beautiful, but it can get messy. She feels like she is wasting your time and that makes her feel terrible.

She has gone through things.


Even if it doesn't seem like a big deal to you, it's a big deal to her and going through this isn't easy. Her past is doing a good job coming back to haunt her present, and is trying to determine her future - even though, that is ultimately all in her power. However, it's simple to run away from things that were once familiar and comfortable, because people can be so easily afraid of getting hurt again. She's afraid of getting hurt again, so hiding is the safest route.

New love brings back old pain.

Those new feelings that she has towards you, are both exciting and terrifying. Feeling things for someone else is a reminder of what she used to feel with the person that broke her heart and basically destroyed her outlook on love and relationships.

Love isn't always equal.

Even though two people can love each other so much, there is always that part where someone is going to be the one who loves more - that person who puts in just a little bit extra than the other, the one who fights the most. Chances are, this girl was the one who fought a little bit harder than her ex significant other. She's afraid to put her heart on her sleeve because she's so used to trying harder and getting let down - and she's sick of it. She wants someone to also fight for her just as much.

She doesn't want to be like this forever

Believe it or not, she doesn't want to run away from falling in love. She feels trapped inside of herself, afraid she will end up alone just because her current feelings stemmed from her past cling so tightly to her, and are so strong. She so badly wants to shed those feelings of fear so she can move on with her life. She wants to fall in love. She is a romantic. She doesn't want to be this way, and she hates it.

I know that she shouldn't let this rule her, and she can't keep depending on the past as an excuse . . . but that's the thing - it's not an excuse, it's her reality. Shedding the past in order to become vulnerable again, isn't easy for some people who have been hurt multiple times. Other people can do it better, some, not so much. But that doesn't mean that they are not capable or are broken. Some of the most cooped up people who stash their hearts away, are some of the most romantic, and that's what is heart-breaking. Listen to her.

Cover Image Credit: favim

Popular Right Now

Things I brought to college I didn't know would be a lifesaver. 

The top 5 things I brought to college I didn't know would be so useful and helpful throughout my first year,

A Trunk

Having a trunk is such a useful purchase! It has so many jobs in my dorm room. I can lock my valuables in it, use it as a step stool, have extra seating for guests when they come in and it can also be used as a table! It's also a cute decoration.

Hats

A blessing in disguise. 50% of the time I wear a hat when my hair isn't doing what it is supposed to do. It also adds a little something extra to your outfit!


Fuzzy socks

They're honestly a saving grace! Going to school in such a cold climate, having fuzzy sicks makes everything better. Putting these on while walking around campus or even sitting in your dorm can make any day a little better and more comfortable.

Hamper with wheels

Where I attend college, the laundry room is in the basement and there is no elevator. So having a hamper with wheels has made transporting laundry so much easier.

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

To The Celebrities Who Didn't Wear Black To The Golden Globes

In a sea of black, red will shine through.

The Golden Globes were aired this past. If you didn't notice, Hollywood decided to coordinate their color dresses but some celebrities stuck out from the crowd like sore thumbs. The event was meant to advocate for sexual harassment and sexual assault in the entertainment industry and hoped that by making a statement with color, the message would be heard worldwide that women are no longer remaining silent when oppressed by powerful misogynists.

Maybe some missed the memo and decided to roll with it anyway, or they simply chose to remain completely separate from this highly politicized issue. Either way, the time and place for individuality may not have been a place dedicated to activism.

Blanca Blanco and Barbara Meier were among the few women who chose to wear red to the awards ceremony. People had some interesting things to say about it, too:

Some may have responded in rather funny ways, but the root of this issue is anything but humorous. These women made their statements as to why they chose not to dress in black, but people are not accepting these responses as valid.

Blanca Blanco simply responded, “I love red,” which not only refuses to address the actual issue of failure to support, but it does little to really explain her choice. If you ask a football player who refuses to kneel during the anthem why they do it, I’m sure their response wouldn’t be, “I like standing.” Every choice means something, and one can venture a guess that choices made by people of high fame are almost inherently political.

As entertainers and icons, it is important to exercise your voice and be heard and stand up for issues that impact the majority of people. To wear red when women supporting sexual harassment and assault victims are wearing black is not only disrespectful to the cause, it essentially states to these women that what they are advocating for is not worth supporting, or worse, is not worth acknowledging at all.

Cover Image Credit: NBC

Related Content

Facebook Comments