It could just be me, but I feel like we’re all facing this weird pressure recently to prove to others that our lives are filled with aesthetically pleasing desserts, an exciting social life and an apartment that looks like an elaborate Pinterest spread. The issue is that when our social media presence doesn’t measure up to that standard, we get stressed out. Our lives clearly aren’t as meaningful or important as they should be merely because our Instagram feed isn’t as well-curated as someone else’s. I think that the real issue here is that we feel like everything we do necessitates some kind of sharing with the rest of the world.

Which is pretty stupid, if you think about it.

Social media is a brand that we create for ourselves, a way to market our lives/foods/friends/drinks/significant others to our followers and make them want to see more. Sometimes it feels like a competition consisting of clever captions, perfectly arranged plates and (almost) candid laughter. I’m not saying I don’t absolutely buy into this competition; I’m just saying we need to stop taking a really well-edited social media presence at face value.

We don’t see the lives without the filters, the moments that aren’t as fulfilling or beautiful or cool or romantic. It’s important to remember that we should not be defined or limited by the ideas of other people, or the dangerous perception that if we aren’t living a picture perfect life, we aren’t living at all. Life isn’t fun sometimes, and realistically you’re not always going to feel like you’re doing your absolute best to make every day count.

That’s OK, too.

It’s OK to not be OK, and it’s OK to feel a little messy sometimes. Human nature is messy. As Hannah Montana so eloquently sang, “Nobody’s perfect.” Sometimes you’re going to miss a pivotal moment, and that’s OK, too. We shouldn’t feel the pressure to capture every single second of our lives and document it for the world. Shouldn’t we be living our lives for us?

Shouldn’t we be making damn sure that we’re happy with the person we are and the life we’re living instead of focusing on the opinions of others? Social media is, first and foremost, a mechanism to share our lives with the world. But the worst thing it can become is an obligation to prove day in and day out that you are also having the time of your life 24/7. That kind of obligation is detrimental, especially in the long term. It creates petty comparisons and unhappiness, and instills a belief that the grass is greener on the other side.

Nah, dudes. The grass is greener where you water it, and to be completely honest, you probably don’t even know what the grass looks like on their side. People only show you what they want to show you! Your life doesn’t have less value because you only made it to the beach once this summer or forgot to take a pic of your crepes at brunch.

So let’s keep sharing our pics/vids/lives for us because we felt happy or loved or pumped to eat Korean barbecue tacos, not because we’re trying to prove something. People have respect and appreciation for genuine emotion, and I guarantee this positivity will spill over into all the moments that aren’t captured on camera.

As per usual, it’s all about perspective.