Our generation today is consumed with the validation, reassurance and assessment of our self-worth. We spend a significant amount of time on social media stalking, comparing and envying those that are around us. Our value is represented by the number of likes, retweets, shares and comments we receive. Validation of our self-worth and love is measured through how much response we get from others.

But I am here to tell you, we have it all wrong. Don’t get me wrong, I am just as guilty of watching the push notifications on my phone to reveal how many likes my newest Instagram post got or to scroll through my Facebook feed to see the cool things my friends are doing. But that number of likes represents absolutely nothing. The comparison of my life to what others are posting about means nothing. It is easy to be consumed with the technology that is right under our noses and miss out on how important each one of us really is. The convenient access to validation of how beautiful, handsome, popular and cool we are has made us all succumb to victims of caring entirely too much about what others think. It is much easier to hide behind a phone and show and tell people what they might want to see or hear than to accept who we really are.

From a young age, we are told that there is an image we must fit, but we are also told to not care about what anyone else thinks. How can any of this be true when we accept the definition of what is perfect, what is cool and what beauty is as defined by society?

When you look in the mirror, can you honestly say you love the person you see? Why or why not? Is it the unmanageable curly hair or the acne scars that are a constant reminder of your adolescent years? Maybe it’s the lack of a thigh gap or flawless skin that we are constantly reminded are features of beauty; as seen in magazines and movies. Let me tell you, this all must stop.

I challenge you to put the mirror away and stop picking your physical attributes apart. Stop attempting to find the right lighting or using the app the Kardashian’s use to tune up their bodies. Stop measuring your self-worth from the responses your friends or followers give you on social media. The intangible internal characteristics are the ones that hold and measure the beauty of yourself. I think we often forget that.

When we seek validation of who we are through others, we lose the value, authenticity and respect for ourselves. Picking out every single flaw and mistake you have made is much easier than accepting who you are. But, hiding those flaws is also just as easy. Trying to please people by saying, posting and doing what they like or want is exhausting. But the moment that you can accept your insecurities and boast your own strengths, will be the day that you realize how much your self-worth is important.

It is impossible to feel self-worth every single moment, after all, we are only human. Forgive yourself when you cannot fight the battle, and pick yourself back up because there is an entire life ahead of you and loving yourself makes it even better.