My week has been terrible, and it’s only Wednesday.
I’m sorry for straying from my usual alternation between article and listicle (perhaps I will follow with a super, BuzzFeed-esque listicle next week) however, the events of my week deserved more than a cute list with funny gifs.
First, the jack form my charger lodged itself into my laptop, preventing it from charging. I took it to Best Buy with about 3% battery, and the Geek Squad technician kindly told me that they would need to send the device to either California or Kentucky to be repaired. He said that the technicians there would either replace the motherboard or remove it and send me a gift card to buy a replacement, and therefore remove my hard drive with it.
After essentially asking him to translate to normal English, the Geek Squad technician informed me that it would erase any data saved on the computer, and asked if I had any important documents on it. Of course, being a human in the 21st century, there were definitely things of importance.
The technician advised that I back-up my information, but the battery was so low, and charging it was a no-go, so we scrapped that idea. (Luckily, I did not have a lot of written or online assignments due in the foreseeable future, many important written documents were on Google Docs, and we had paid the $100 for a protection plan last summer, knowing that I would inevitably ruin my first laptop somehow, so there was no charge... At least a part of my week has been positive).
Secondly, in choir, we are learning rather difficult French pieces. Not only that, but being a Lauridsen piece, the altos have strange, dissonant parts that don't feel like they fit with the rest of the ensemble. So while I'm struggling with new notes and rhythms, I'm also learning a whole new language, which, I have learned, does not come easy to my American-ese speaking brain and tongue. So now even choir, which used to be a relaxing getaway from the toils of academia, has become a source of stress, struggle and plummeting self-esteem.
Third, I am so behind in history reading. If you didn't already know, I am a history major. I love my professor, his lectures, the subject, everything... but the textbook is so boring. Additionally, I am a learner, which in part means that I need to learn the material, not just study it. With a test coming up on Thursday (aka tomorrow), I have quite a task ahead of me.
And fourth, as a lovely icing on top of this piece of crap cake, I feel like I have the plague...
Maybe that's a slight exaggeration, but I have been bedridden with the most extreme fatigue I've experienced since we got some sort of super-flu after my mom decided the family would skip the flu shot, I have had the most ridiculous and inconvenient migraines, crippling anxiety, nausea and stomach pains to the point where I have desired an organ transplant, and a lovely visit from good ol' Aunt Flow.
Usually, when stress from schoolwork and physically immobilizing sickness take over my life, I resort to denial and escapism – I deny my responsibilities and their due dates, occasionally skip class and binge watch YouTube videos.
For me, YouTube is like an extrovert experience in solitude; I connect with other people via a screen and recharge. However, even my go-to paradise failed to cure me.
At this point of the article, I'm sure you're looking back at the title, wondering when I will deliver some ray of sunshine and positivity. Fear not, dear reader. It is coming.
At the lovely George Fox University, we have chapel every week. Even when I don't feel like going (I have a million and one assignments due the next day, it's raining – we are in Oregon, after all – and I don't want to see or hear another human being for a century), I still go to Vespers.I do not attend a "real" church, so I have sanctioned off Wednesday from 7:00 nights to [insert time when worship team decides to end] as my church time.
As soon as the first chord of the first worship song played, all the stress and sickness of the week melted away. The heaviness of my chest was lifted, the panic of claustrophobia was subdued, the worry of the 160 pages of history to read was released, the difficulty of the French language was forgotten, and I focused on the holiness, love, sovereignty and goodness of the Living God.
The key to happiness is a Christ-centered life, sustained through worship.
Pain is selfish – it puts the focus on me. My head hurts, my stomach is sore, I have so much homework. Worship is God-centered.
To close, I will quote Scripture. In Bible class, we are studying the beautiful and challenging book of Romans:
"Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us." Romans 5:3-5
"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." Romans 8:18
