For years people have asked what the worst quality I have about myself is, and I was never able to come up with the answer. Surprisingly enough the other day I was able to figure out exactly what it was. Forgiveness. Now most people would see that as a wildly redeeming personality trait, yet I have realized it is consistently my downfall. A friend hurt me, I forgive them because maybe they didn’t mean it. Boyfriend cheated on me, I forgive them because maybe he really didn’t download tinder and his phone actually did re download it on accident. Dad was abusive yet still tries to be in my life, I desperately want to forgive him. This trait is not the best quality as many would thing, others might see this as me being naïve, but I chose to look at it as being a forgiving person.
Being forgiving has really bit me in the ass a few times. When you have a friend or significant who constantly says mean things to/about you and then you try to make up excuses as to why they said it. A forgiving person is constantly hearing apologies and responding with an its ok so that you two can be okay and talk again. Its draining and tiresome being the person who is always forgiving those who have done them wrong. As far as family members letting you down, my dad is always a winner for that. He let me down countless times and was generally a not so great person, yet he is a manipulative person and I'm a forgiver and suddenly my brain and heart are torn between the two. Wanting to forgive yet not wanting to let them in, it’s a struggle.
Sometimes its better to forgive and move on then to stay bitter but other times forgiving and forgetting can make you naïve. Don't be naïve. Forgive and remember and move on from those mistakes.
