I am an experienced Starbucks drinker. The total amount of time I’ve spent in Starbucks probably equals the total amount of time I’ve spent in college classrooms. I’ve seen a lot of people drink a lot of drinks, but you can be sure they always fall into one of these eight categories.
1. Tea
You’re pretty quirky. You probably read a lot and you’re a dreamer; possibly a bit introverted because you’re always in your own world with your head in the clouds. You’ve got this intriguing old world charm thing going – you’re probably a true gentleman or lady.
2. Latte
You’re the down-to-earth guy/girl next door. You have a taste for simplicity, and you know you can’t beat the classics. If you were a store you’d be The Gap. You have a lot of friends because you get along with a lot of different people. You’re not one to pick fights, and you’re easy going.
3. Tea Latte
Congratulations, you’re the best of both tea and latte worlds – you’re the quirky girl/guy next door! Unique and well-liked. Endearingly different. One of a kind but not a weirdo. Good on you. That’s a hard balance to find.
4. Frappuccino
You’re a kid at heart. Let’s face it, fraps are just milkshakes disguised as adult coffee drinks. You love to laugh, and you don’t take life too seriously. Your favorite season is probably summer. You love Disney and regularly indulge your inner child with things like cartoon-covered Band-Aids and stuffed animals. You’re currently very into the minions. You use the smiling poop emoji regularly.
5. Plain Coffee
You’re a little rough around the edges, but you’re too busy getting stuff done to care. You’re a hard worker, and you’d rather lead a steady life than an extraordinary one. You probably do things with your hands and like to teach children; whatever it is, it’s something that other people think is tedious, but you love it. Who has time to pick some sissy drink with flavoring and soymilk? In fact, you probably don’t even go to Starbucks that much.
6. Macchiato
You’re downright edgy. Modern and trendy, you probably have the latest gadget before everyone else. Your aesthetic is sleek, and the majority of the things you own are silver or black. You appreciate real leather. You like the finer things in life…and you’re a huge coffee snob. Seriously, what even is a macchiato?
7. Espresso
Super duper Type A, you crush every task with vigor. You’re probably a marathon runner, surgeon, or chemical engineer. You were valedictorian and class president in high school. You’re aggressively cheerful, too. You need the extra energy so you can stay up all night writing your memoir!
8. Pumpkin Spice Latte or Peppermint Mocha
You are most likely a female age 13-30. Your favorite season is fall and/or your favorite holiday is Christmas. Other things you enjoy include but are not limited to: cat videos, Netflix, shoes, shopping for shoes and the movie Clueless. But who doesn’t like Clueless?! People might call you “basic,” but they really just mean popular, right? Besides, the people making fun of you are probably macchiato drinkers anyways…stinkin’ snobs.
